This is true.
Here I am again, sitting at my computer fully erect whilst watching people upload pornographic pictures and videos of myself from my computer over a very popular file sharing network. Each new upload turns me on a little more. Who’s just seen that photo? Was it a neighbor? A friend? A colleague? Maybe even a family member.
Is there someone that knows me personally sitting at a computer right now, aroused and shocked, wondering how they’re going to look me in the eye next time we meet? Will they close the picture and try to forget what they saw or will they download another? Will they masturbate?
I was an early adopter of home internet access. In the dial-up days, the delivery of porn was very different; it was mainly distributed via Usenet or various types of file sharing software. The software was simple enough to use, but if it wasn’t set up very carefully, it was easy to share a lot more than intended!
My girlfriend of the time and I used to take lots of naughty photos of each other (you can probably see where this is going already!) and, well, they got shared overnight – and all the next day. You’re probably thinking “Yeah right… ‘accidentally’ shared.” Honestly though, this was a full-on cold sweat “Oh Shit!” moment. Everyone I knew that owned a computer used the same software. That included everyone at work and most of my friends. Damn, even my aunt and uncle grabbed the occasional mp3 and whatever else caught their eye. I was in trouble!
As I pored over the log file, I realized that every single photo had been uploaded multiple times. To make matters worse, most of the uploaders would probably share their copy too. Like rabbits, the number of copies of these pictures floating around the network were multiplying almost exponentially.
I had never been so aroused in all my life!
My thoughts were filled with images of strangers winking at me in the street and friends fervently masturbating over my most private moments. I fantasized about being greeted at work with shy smiles and knowing glances. I was dreading, yet simultaneously hoping, that someone had seen something they shouldn’t have.
I fired the software back up and waited; it didn’t take long for an upload. The photo was one of me lying on my bed sporting a rock hard erection with my hands behind my head. Anyone I knew who saw it would instantly recognize me. Furthermore, it was now in the wild; I had no way to get it back or remove it from the internet. It was destined to be shared over and over again, and it’s still available to this day.
It was at that point that I knew I’d found a new fetish; I wanted people to see these and I wanted the glances and smiles. This was turning me on more than anything I could remember. However, I didn’t think it was fair to share the photos containing my girlfriend without her consent, so I moved those ones out of the way of the software then thought about file names.
Until this point, the photo’s names were assigned by the camera that took them. These took the form “DSCN0001.jpg”, “DSCN0002.jpg”, etc. I soon realized that these weren’t particularly easy for people to find; they were only visible to people looking for automated digital camera names. To make them appear in more search results, I renamed the files more descriptively, with names like “wanking in bed.jpg” and “wanking in the garden.jpg”. The number of uploads increased dramatically as people searching for “wanking” found them.
For night after night, I sat in my little office watching people take copies of my private porn. On weekends, I often persuaded my girlfriend to drive us to naughty outdoor locations for fun and photos. I knew that she had to be told what was happening with them before she figured it out, so one evening, whilst standing naked in a phone box, I nervously blurted “I’ve been sharing these online”. She just smiled and said “I know. Don’t worry, so long as you don’t share the ones with me in them.” and that was all that needed to be said. We collected a lot of pictures of me naked and masturbating all over my hometown and while she watched soap operas, I’d share them with the world.
The thrill of sharing myself started to feel a little too normal and I found myself needing to do something naughtier to get the same thrill. As one of my fantasies was to be recognized in public, I became braver when naming files. I began to include the location the photo was taken. e.g. “Naked at the cash machine, Tesco, Castle lane, Bournemouth.jpg”.
One night, in a sexually charged mad moment, I took the ultimate step. I included my real name, town, street and route to work in the some of the filenames. e.g. “(my name) from (my street +town) See him walking to work past the train station every morning.JPG” If somebody had wanted to see this exhibitionist in the flesh, it was suddenly very easy to find me. None of my naked photos were close-ups. They all had my face clearly visible, and I even included some side-by-side nude and clothed images to make public recognition easier.
The first upload of a file containing my real name brought me to a spontaneous orgasm. As usual, I’d been gently masturbating for hours and was already rock hard, but the orgasm caught me completely by surprise. With the immediate craving for release out of the way, I panicked, shut down the computer and vowed to stop flashing myself online. That vow lasted almost 24 hours before I shared my photos again. I was addicted!
The delivery of online porn changed in nature over the years. It began to rely less on file sharing and moved to the current free amateur content driven model. Throwing any remaining caution to the wind, I sent my private porn collection to every site I could find that had an upload button. I didn’t care if it was retrievable, I just craved the rush of exposure. My real name is a very loosely kept secret now and anyone who searches for it will find me naked. I’m sure it must have happened countless times by people I know.
These days, workmates occasionally allude to something they can only have seen to know about. None have told me directly that they’ve seen me nude, but I still get nervous at times. Sometimes I’ll get a long look from a stranger in the street or supermarket. The pattern is a puzzled glance, then a second and third longer stare, followed by a shake of the head and they’re gone. This never fails to make my heart skip and my cock twitch. I can never really be sure if someone has seen me nude unless they tell me, but I think that many of the people I know must have done.
Even if I wanted to, I can conceive of no way to undo what I did. My photos and videos are on almost every porn site somewhere, shared on every file sharing network, been used in banner adverts, posted throughout countless forums (some of the pictures are naughty and funny!) and have basically become embedded into the fabric of the internet.
The videos alone have gained millions of views each across thousands of websites and have been reused and re-posted way beyond my control. I’m now included in porn site starter packs, torrent compilations, trailers for DVDs and more. I’ve become a kind of “stock porn”.
My naked image has essentially become public domain and it still turns me on. Perhaps you’ve already seen me!
Thank you for very much for reading. Comments are most appreciated. I’d particularly love feedback from others who’ve done something similar, or are interested in my tale for research. Finally, if you’re curious to see me naked after reading all this, try searching for “madexhibitionist” on any search engine to get a hint at just how far my image has spread!
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/3z9z1w/how_i_became_an_online_exhibitionist_m