Not long after I graduated from college, I ended up taking a trip to Vegas — to party and meet up with some friends that lived there. The night was pretty epic (as they tend to be in Vegas), as a couple my friends worked in the club scene there and got us under the ropes all around town.
The crew was me, two friends I played football with in college, and a girl we all went to school with, Jen. Jen was a bit of a party girl in college, but super cool, and a notoriously great wingman — to paint the picture, she was short, petite frame, short dirty-blonde hair, with average looks, but some very real and very large breasts; you know the kind of the girl that maybe wasn't first choice at the bar, but would get your undivided attention in a bikini. Anyway, we ended up making our way around town, getting hit on by a swingers couple at Hard Rock, bottle service at Rain then Ghost bar, a trip to the Rhino and finally, some late late night action with the working girls at Dre's. How the night actually ended was a bit of blur, but I think we had all piled into a cab with an intention of checking out this swingers club we'd been invited to, but before long Jen tapped out and asked if we could drop her by her house. Being well past drunk, I jumped out at her place too and asked to crash on her couch.
While I definitely would hook up with Jen, I was honestly just desperate for some water and in no mood for whatever craziness a swingers club brings about at 5AM vs. looking to make a move on Jen. I went to crash on the couch and Jen invited me to share her bed, where I passed out fully clothed the instant I hit the bed. It felt like an hour, but the next thing I knew was being woken up by Jen taking my clothes off. First, unbuttoning my shirt, then taking off my belt, and unbuttoning my pants, before coming up to start kissing my neck and chest. I wasn't about to stop anything, but I did tense up a bit when she started to pull my pants off, to which she put her hand to my lips and told me to "relax"….then continued pulling off my underwear. Once she had me naked, she started slowly kissing and licking up my body, kissing my thighs, licking the shaft of my dick, and kissing my abs and my chest, until she was on top of me and we were making out. She'd been wearing just a bra and panties this whole time so when she came up to where I could reach, I popped her bra off and revealed those beautiful breasts. While, I'd still been waking up to that point, those full, heavy, round breasts got me fully hard instantly. But before I could really enjoy the view, she pulled herself back, and started to go down on me. Between the strip club, all the girls I'd talked to and danced with all night, that first wet stroke as her mouth engulfed by dick was the most amazing feeling…..which made it even more jarring when she stopped after only 3-4 strokes and sat up! "You're not Derek!" she said, to which I was really fucking confused since I am 100% sure my name isn't Derek. When I asked her what was going on, she told me, she woke up super horny and thought I was the guy she was dating, Derek, which is why she'd started molesting me in my sleep!
She wasn't so much mad, as she was embarrassed and in disbelief that she'd just blown me thinking I was someone else. Not knowing what else to say, I told her that I was sorry, but said that I liked it if she wanted to keep going. She that she shouldn't, and reminded me that I had told her I was dating someone too, but went on to say that she was sooooo horny and all of that foreplay may have got her worked up beyond the point of no return. Wanting to go back to the whole 'my dick in her mouth part', I suggested maybe we just fool around a bit — a little oral, get each other off, no harm no foul, right? In drunken, horny logic, this worked and Jen donned a ear to ear smile before resuming going down on me. I can't remember if she was good, but she was certainly eager, so between that and the strippers, I blew my load in what felt like no time all, and she swallowed with a big smile which I always love!
I started going down on her, and she ended up being super fun to go down on — she was writhing and moaning, arching her back to force those giant tits up in the air and fingering her nipples….it was all very fucking hot. It was so much fun, I kept going after she came the first time, and would have after the second time, but she begged me to stop. She pulled me up to her, and started kissing me and licking her juices off of me, finally begging me to fuck her. By that time I'd kind of bought into our little "oral-only" agreement, so I was a tiny bit hesitant, but offered to go down on her again (since it was so much fun!) — which is when she told me why she stopped that first blow job…..once she got my dick in her mouth she said, she realized "hey, Derek's dick got a lot bigger…..wait who's dick is this?", and thats when she stopped to make out my face in the dark. She said she thought a little oral would be enough, but she can't stop thinking about what my dick would feel like inside her as she's never been with anyone that big….and its been a fantasy of hers.
Like I said, I'd already gotten off, I was already dating someone, and we didn't have condoms, so I was really leaning toward this only oral thing, but Jen started begging me….finally offering, that if I did fuck her, I could do anything I wanted. Anything I asked? Anything, she said….so I was in!!! I'm not sure why, but the first thing I did was ask if she had any toys, to which she pulled out a small wand vibrator and a large veiny, girthy dildo. I had her turn over on her hands and knees, and started licking her pussy from behind and fingering her butt….working up to turning on the vibrator and sliding it in her butt. When I finally got it inside, I slid my dick insider her pussy and started fucking her. I just remember her pussy being so fucking wet, it was like fucking a slip-and-slide, and within minutes she was having a 5 min long wake-the-neighbors orgasm. When she finally finished and caught her breath, I pulled out the vibrator and tried to put my dick in her ass, but it was just not happening, as I'm pretty girthy. Being a helluva a good sport, she suggested it may be easier if she laid on her back, but asked me to fuck her a bit first as its easier for her to relax when she's really aroused, and play with her clit as I tried to slip it in. We fucked a bit more and when I went to try anal again, I thought that if fingering her clit was good, that large thick dildo would be better!!
In all honesty, the anal was too tight and was almost painful on my dick, but between my dick in her ass and the giant vibrating dildo, it was REALLY fucking hot watch her overload on stimulation. Her head going side to like she was possessed, she was biting the sheets next to her, and making noises somewhere in between panting and screaming. At the time it was bit much for me to process, but when she told me after how she'd fantasized about a threesome with two hung guys and how she was just realizing that she liked rough sex, it got me pretty hot thinking of how much she dug our little adventure. We finished the night with a little titty fucking before I came in her mouth again, and we both collapsed in a heap, well after the sun had rise on the new day.
We finally woke up at 5PM that night with wicked hangovers, and quite a crime scene of bodily fluids and sex toys scattered across her bedroom. Before I even had time to process where I was exactly and what had happened, she said "Oh shit, Derek is supposed to be picking me up in an hour!" Wait, who's Derek, oh yeah…the guy you're dating. When she got in shower, I decided I could use a rinse too and picked up where'd left off the day before, fucking her in the shower, and leaving a present in Jen's mouth for Derek on their date. And as if it couldn't get worse, Jen's roommate (another friend of mine, and my ride to my hotel) got called into work while we were in the shower….so good 'ole Derek ended up driving me back to my hotel on the strip before he bought Jen dinner….
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/3g2f75/im_wasnt_who_shef_thought_i_was
"You’re not Derek". Classic!
Man I love the excuses we think up when we’re horny