I’m a 26 year old female who was a porn star. I still cringe at the title of porn star since I wasn’t a famous porn actress. But in reality it wasn’t my goal to be a star. In fact I shied away from any opportunity to be a star. I was asked to make different choices to be a star or more well known but chose a path to remain less known. The main reason is I knew there would be a stigma attached to what I did that would follow me my entire life. And if I was famous, I wasn’t sure I was strong enough to face that the rest of my life.
I feel compelled to write this now because of all the negativity I see around about porn and the porn industry. In some ways porn is more accepted than it’s ever been. But in other ways the media and the recent Hot Girl Wanted documentary paint a picture that isn’t accurate since it only shows one side. With being involved in porn come accusations, assumptions and sometimes a hatred for it. I’m hoping that in some small way I can show a different side.
What are some of the assumptions? That the girls are all on drugs. They have low self esteem. The girls are uneducated. They only do it for the money or come from poor families. They’ve been abused as young girls. They all have STD’s. That they are forced into the industry or doing things they don’t want to do.
This wasn’t my experience but I’m sure if you look around, you can find these scenarios. I can only really speak to my experience, my motivations and my background and even those around me. As for me, I was a college graduate, I came from a wealthy family and I literally don’t have to work if I don’t want to. I’ve never taken hard drugs. Never been physically abused and I was not forced into the industry.
The other girls I knew in the industry weren’t on drugs and I wasn’t aware of any abuse. I didn’t know anyone that had STD’s. And I knew of nobody that was forced. We were all there because we wanted to do it for any of a number of reasons. For others, money and recognition or some level of fame was a huge motivator. Some for the sexual experiences even though a lot of porn isn’t like normal sex as I would learn. But we all entered into the industry with our eyes wide open not forced.
For me the motivation wasn’t just one thing. I didn’t do it for the money although the feeling and empowerment of making money because of my sexuality was surprisingly fulfilling. My motivations were that of a young girl of 22. The attention and compliments about my looks and sexuality were a huge draw. I admit that my relationship with my father and his lack of compliments led me to feel a void. He was never abusive by any means. But not having the unconditional love and admiration of your father is a huge factor in shaping a young girl and it shaped me and my sister. (It’s much better now). So when I was approached by an older father figure who gave me compliments and painted a picture that being in porn videos could provide for me, it made me listen. But that wasn’t enough. I was also driven by the potential sexual experiences. I had never had a one night stand or casual sex before and I wondered if I was missing anything. All of my sex before was part of a loving relationship with a boyfriend. I had fantasies that many girls probably think about but never expect or even want to fulfill. For me sex with guys who had a larger penis or sex with more than one guy and even having two guys inside of me at once were something I fantasized about at times but as a female, you can’t admit it or be considered a slut. I wanted to feel wanted and wanted to be submissive and let go for a while and yes, I wanted to have crazy sex to see what it was like with guys who had a lot of experience. And the last motivation for me was popularity on some level. To be the interesting or sexy girl and be the one that guys wanted since I never thought guys thought about me in that way. I was always the rich cute girl, the loner girl or quiet girl who had a cute body. I was never the sexy girl that guys wanted to have sex with. Not that I wanted to have sex with a lot of guys, but I wanted them to want me. As a young girl, being wanted and fitting in is so important.
None of this would have mattered if I didn’t feel safe. Safe from STD’s, being raped or worse. It should also be noted that I didn’t seek out the industry but instead was asked. It never even crossed my mind to pursue porn and had I not have been asked, I never would have done it. This happened through a group of new friends I was hanging out with and little did I know a few of them were in the porn industry. I never would have guessed because they were all so normal and the blended in perfectly with those that were accountants, students, hair stylists and computer programs in the group. When I was asked I had all kinds of emotions and thoughts around it. My immediate reaction was not to go for it. I am a person that researches things and I had enough interest and intrigue to learn more about it…after my initial “hell no” response. lol
So I researched it. I spoke to two girls that were porn actresses. I met three of the guys. Everyone was so…. normal. They weren’t pushy. They were smart, articulate and supportive of whatever decision I made. They told me the good and bad things. What it was like. What to expect and what it takes to be good at it. And they showered me with praise and encouragement. The other research I did was on safety on the set of porn shoots. I learned about STD testing in the industry and the true risks of that which are lower than those that have casual sex by a wide margin. I asked questions around what was expected of me and had someone look over the contracts. And I watched some scenes that included many of the people I would be asked to perform with. My entire decision process took a little over a week but it dominated my mind 24/7.
I’m now 3+ years removed from being in scenes so I have 20/20 hindsight on things. I did almost 30 scenes having sex with about a dozen different guys and even experimented with a few females in those scenes. (Not for me I’ve decided – I like guys) I made over $50,000 and had experiences that ranged from almost normal boyfriend type sex to simulated forced sex to rough sex, multiple penetration and a few fetish scenes (nylons and feet).
What I learned and breaking down or confirming some porn misconceptions:
Porn sex isn’t like real sex – There were times the sex was just a job. But there were also scenes where it was incredibly sexual and fulfilling. I had real orgasms on several occasions but a lot of the scenes were more about capturing the elements the director wanted versus having a fulfilling sexual experience. I have heard some people say that all porn is fake and I can assure you, they are only half right. Some of it is very real with incredible feelings and reactions.
All porn guys have huge penises – Definitely not true but for some, um..yeah. Most of the guys were slightly above normal but not crazy big. But a few were bigger than I really thought possible or that I thought I could handle. And no, I am not ruined for normal size guys. Bottom line is size mostly doesn’t matter and can be more of a negative.
You don’t have to disconnect your emotions to have porn sex – I hear all the time that people in porn have disconnected sex. Maybe some do. I did a few times but usually I was fully present and connected to the situation. Many of the guys I performed with I connected with them before or during the scene. It made the sex better and the scene better. Even at times where I was asked to submit, that was it’s own connection. Trusting someone to take control of your body and to take full advantage of you on camera takes a level of connection I learned. Without trust, I never could have submitted.
Rough sex the girls have isn’t enjoyable – Yes I had some OMG moments. I had to calm myself or connect with my sexual desires and fantasies and 90% of the time it was incredibly erotic for me. To feel the raw desire a guy has for you and the primal actions he takes with you if you are open to it are indescribable. I had moments of complete and utter bliss. It brought out primal feelings in me. Yes I felt used but that isn’t a bad thing. There are times I’ve used my boyfriends for my sexual pleasure as well. Riding him or taking him inside of me and letting my feelings and desires come naturally. My boyfriends have always enjoyed when I let myself completely go and become a sexual being and to me some of my scenes were the same with me on the receiving end.
All girls regret being in porn later in life – I’m sure some do. But I have met or spoken to enough girls that don’t regret it. The question is do I regret it and I can honestly say no without hesitation. Are there challenges with having done it? Sure. But I don’t regret it. In fact had I not done it I believe without hesitation that I would regret not doing it. Will I regret it when I’m older? Time will tell but I don’t think I will.
You are taken advantage of – Yes this is sort of true. But you mostly go into it knowing this. You are trading your body and innocence to make a little money and to make the producers a lot of money. But many businesses are like this where management makes profits from hard work of lower level employees.So is it really being taken advantage of? IDK. I got more out of it than just the money and overall I can’t say I was completely taken advantage of.
You are forced to do things you don’t want to do or didn’t agree to – I think this is partly true based on my experience and talking to others. Before filming we provide our hard limits and things we don’t want to do. We are also told we can stop the scene at any time but it’s made pretty clear that if all possible you should stay with the scene. I want to make it clear. I never felt raped. There were times I should have or wanted to tap out. Or where things I didn’t expect were done. Usually this had to do with roughness or forced or controlled penetration. Spanking and hair pulling wasn’t always agreed to but in hindsight made the scene more popular and better for the audience. I freely admit that in most cases the director (and actors) needed to have some creative freedom even if it was at the expense of me. It was after all what I signed up for and allowed to happen. I could have said no or stopped it at any time.
Just a few other facts:
I am from the United States but performed in Russia so the experience could be completely different from porn in the US or other countries. I have family from Russia so I was there for an extended visit when this happened the first time.
I was 22 when I started and 23 when I stopped and had recently graduated from college. I looked younger so they played me off as a teenager.
I stopped because I had fulfilled my needs and desires mostly and I had an incident that led me to want to leave. This was an isolated incident and I blame one person and not the industry.
My family doesn’t know nor do most of my friends. Those that do are mostly accepting I recently told my sister and she is supportive of me.
If you have respectful questions, I’m happy to answer them. I just wanted to paint a little different picture than some of the negative stories or documentaries that have come out recently.
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/39v4w3/confessions_of_a_real_porn_star_what_its_really
You should do an AMA for this. Thank you for the information, it’s always great to hear from people in the industry.
Honestly it would be really cool to read about what you thought was your hottest shoot here. You seem like you could write a well written and entertaining account. Minus any details that could be harmful of course.
I kept a journal so sort of have that. But never shared it.
Care to elaborate on the incident that caused you to leave? Not looking for names, just what happened.
It would be fun to read in a story edited format I’m sure.
I will think about it. I haven’t read them in a while.
I had pretty much made up my mind to quit. I didn’t want to continue in the lifestyle of porn even though I still got a rush doing it. I was just done and ready to be a normal girl. The producers knew I was going to stop and one of them who also directed set me up for a shoot. Usually when you schedule a shoot you know who it’s with, what is entailed in the scene (ie. Anal, facial, roughness, etc.) I was told it was with one guy and I showed up and it was two guys plus a girl. I didn’t react well to the change which maybe was unprofessional since I usually tried to be accommodating. I was being pretty emotional and probably hard to deal with but I sat down and talked to the director. I found out later that he definitely put something in my drink. The scene was a blur and I don’t remember a lot of it. It was the one time I definitely felt taken advantage of and the scene was nothing like me. The way I looked and acted. That cemented it for me. But I know it was really the fault of one person.
Interesting stuff, thanks for sharing. How would you say that having the experiences in porn has affected your sexuality (or you as a sexual being) generally? Are you more daring now? More willing to go for what you want? And how has it affected your relationships since?
What sex acts did you do for the first time in your life on camera? I mean, when you did anal or girl/girl stuff on camera, was it the first time you’d ever done it in your life? What was that like having the camera watch you? Hot? Intimidating?
I had done anal before. I first tried that with my first boyfriend so I was used to that. The girl stuff was basically first time. In college I was on the receiving end though. A lot of the other things were the first time. Having a camera and other people watching was strange at first. I closed my eyes a lot so I could forget about them and just feel like I would in normal sex but that doesn’t work well for filming. My early videos I am definitely not as comfortable and look off camera for direction a lot and it’s obvious.
Doing porn took me to and beyond my limits and fantasies so it really did open me up some. I’m very traditional in many ways though. I have a boyfriend that I’m very committed to. He knows about my past and is great about it all. I’m a better lover than I’ve ever been because of my experiences with boyfriends before and porn for sure. I personally think a lot of women are too uptight about sex. But girls are quick to be called sluts if we open up too much. And if we don’t we are labeled other things. It’s sad. I’ve just tried to be true to myself and what I’m feeling.
Did you ever do any creampie scenes..?
I have never believed that pornstars join the industry solely on making money and I also never believed that the sex is fake. 120 scenes filmed in 3 month span, you can’t tell me that Sasha Grey didn’t enjoy at least a few of those genuinely. Plus, I feel like many pornstars come from wealthy families. I think Mia Khalifa the hottest new star was well off before joining the industry. But, I’m glad you took the time to write this.
Yes but just with one guy cumming. But only did a couple.
did you like them?
The point of me writing was to show another side of porn. It seems like lately all you hear about is how bad it is and they show girls that are just not the best representation of all. American porn tends to make it even worse. It would be like assuming all Americans are like the Kardashians (sp?). I didn’t enjoy all of my scenes but I didn’t hate those either. But I can say I definitely enjoyed quite a few. For me there was something that automatically increased the erotic factor because we were being watched and filmed.
Wow, I hope you sued him. What a dick!
Yeah I prefer that. It feels more authentic and like sex with a boyfriend. I think in most cases the guys in the scene would prefer that too but seeing evidence of a guy cumming is a key part of most videos so it doesn’t happen as much as normal sex would.
The other partners in the company ended up kicking him out of the company and they paid me something to be quiet. The fact that they pushed him out of the company meant more than anything. They were very apologetic.
Could you talk about dating while active in porn? Any tips from your boyfriend?
I didn’t have a boyfriend when I was active in porn. I went out on a few dates but that was it. I don’t think I could have a boyfriend and do that. I knew a few people that did it but it wasn’t easy. One of the guys had a girlfriend and she had a hard time handling it for sure. I couldn’t do it either so I don’t blame her.
Did you have any type of relationship outside of work? Like fwb or nsa?
I hooked up with two of the guys I was in scenes with a few times. But that was it.
This is an insanely honest record, I would def love to read more from your journal, we all would I suppose. Two questions: – If you could start over, would you do it again? – You meet a nice guy, you guys hit it off, and at some point you have to tell him that you have done porn. Not every guy can handle that. If he decides to break off at that point, would you regret having done it? I am also curious as to what was your major in college, just curious. Thank you!
Thank you so much for your honesty on the subject. I’ve had a couple of friends who were in it, including the nightmare scenario for one girl I worked with in a job far away from the porn scene: I saw her in a video and recognized her. I know for everyone it is different, and it’s good to see some real thoughts about the job, from people from many points of view.
You seem like a smart girl so this probably doesn’t need say but I would keep those journals quite tightly controlled. The level of interest in Sex in mainstream TV at the moment might just make those journals worth quite a bit. I’m not sure where you’d even start but I’m sure there would be some level of interest in your story.
Thanks for writing and posting, and for being willing to answer questions.
I totally understand the negative side to it or nightmare scenarios. I feel bad for anyone who regrets what they did. I hope I never do. If I had done it under different circumstances, perhaps I would.
I would do it again. I would change a few things and do a few things differently but I would make the same decision. If I started dating someone and they couldn’t handle that I did it, I really don’t know how I would feel. Sure there could be some regret. I guess the fact that I have met someone who can handle it makes me realize it can be done. That’s a whole other story but he did have a hard time accepting it at first and we were in a fwb relationship for quite a while until we finally started dating officially. I honestly didn’t think it would ever work but he knows the entire picture of who I am and now completely supports it and even likes looking back at my videos. This probably isn’t the norm but it shows me and others it’s possible.
Forget to answer your other question. I majored in Business Administration / Marketing and own a small marketing company.
I’ve honestly been thinking of this for a while now. This was my plan B if nothing in my life worked out… but now that i’m understanding mostly what this industry involves, it seems really organic with the right people :) Thanks so much for sharing your experience!
Thank you so much for sharing. It is really important to see more personal accounts.
I would caution you about trying to make it a career. The industry likes young girls and the window is very small for doing it. I was older than most I worked with but I was young looking and athletic so that helped. It’s not for everyone. I think maybe I had a chance to make a lot of money had I been more honest about who I was. But I was afraid of that and didn’t really want that. I didn’t want porn to define who I was. But if you want to do it, standing out from the crowd can lead to a very successful career I believe.
There are all kinds of experiences. I don’t think mine is totally unique. It’s just the accounts the media chooses to show are just one sided. And for those totally against porn I am an example of an inconvenient truth.
Yes, that’s how the media has always been. Picking up on the most sensational bits – totally biased. It’s particularly problematic with porn as it is usually such a hush-hush industry.
It’s interesting the reactions I’ve gotten when people find out. I have definitely gotten the negative at times. But so many people are supportive and very curious or just want to understand. I am pretty sure I’ve talked a lot of people out of going into the industry too that have asked me about it by informing them about the positive and negative aspects. Too bad the media can’t do the same when they cover the story. I would feel the same way if they only covered the positive aspects of it. Can you imagine if that happened? lol
Sadly that would never happen because it simply isn’t as exciting a story. A drug-addled, clinically insane, HIV carrying pornstar with childhood trauma simply sells more. But if more people like you come forward with their personal stories, word will go around.
God, deep respect for that guy. I could never look at videos if I was him, I dont think I would. You sound and seem like a very smart person. I hope life is good for you ahead :)
He’s definitely a great guy and I too am amazed he wants to look at them at times. He can’t watch all of them now that we are closer because a few bother him. If it were me, I couldn’t watch them I don’t think. I mean I know he’s had sex with other girls before and all but I don’t want to see video of it. lol Thanks for the kind words. I wish you and everyone a life of no regrets and amazing experiences.
Hit me up via a private message if you want to chat about it or have more questions.
Sucks you won’t show us
Show you what?
The videos duh lol don’t mind me
I know you said it wasn’t forced, but were there things you did you would not have tried if it wasn’t your job? Did you ever enjoy someone so much you met the later off-camera?
That’s an interesting perspective. Thank you for sharing it. My question is about this scene: >I was told it was with one guy and I showed up and it was two guys plus a girl. I didn’t react well to the change which maybe was unprofessional since I usually tried to be accommodating. I was being pretty emotional and probably hard to deal with but I sat down and talked to the director. I found out later that he definitely put something in my drink. The scene was a blur and I don’t remember a lot of it. It was the one time I definitely felt taken advantage of and the scene was nothing like me. The way I looked and acted. That cemented it for me. You say that you never felt raped. But do you consider that to be sexual assault? Why or why not? Thanks in advance for sharing. :)
That’s a good question and I’m not sure to be honest. I think recreating the types of things that happen in a scene just doesn’t happen in real life very easily. Obviously the scenes where there was somewhat of a story wouldn’t most likely happen in real life. I did "meet up" with two of the guys off camera a few times.
Had you had sex with an audience before? Was it weird to have a room full of people looking at your pussy? Was the girl-girl stuff one on one or part of an overall scene?
Huh, very interesting perspective, thank you for sharing.
Interesting story
I really have a hard time classifying what happened with any certainty. I’ve thought about that situation a lot. I know some people make this out to be a black and white issue in that it’s either rape or not rape. But I don’t see it that way even though it was definitely not appropriate. I could have handled the situation better as well. I think if the scene was slightly changed, I would have been more agreeable and even remembered and enjoyed the scene more. I know this probably doesn’t answer your question but I really have a hard time answering it since the details are so blurred for me. Looking at the scene it’s obvious I wasn’t doing anything against my wishes. Those internal desires definitely came out but I may have made a different decision had I had time and ability to think about it. I could write for hours about this one situation.
This is a great story but I don’t think this belongs in this sub. More informational than a story and nothing too wild about anything.
Most of my scenes were low budget so just one or two other people in the room. A couple scenes were POV with the guy holding the camera. Yes it was strange having someone else there. In early scenes I looked at the director too much or closed my eyes to sort of put that out of my mind. But I got used to it and actually it raised the erotic level of it for me at least. Some can’t handle it especially guys I’m told. There was one guy who was new and he couldn’t get or maintain an erection on camera. He was really embarrassed. Guys have it harder for sure. The girl stuff was part of an overall scene. I was offered girl stuff but wasn’t interested since I feel more comfortable with guys.
Sorry. I didn’t know where to put it. It was my gone wild story and the story of the other side of porn. Sorry if I posted the wrong place but there appears to be some interest in it regardless.
Good read
Thanks for sharing! If you could direct a porn movie, what would happen in it?
OMG. What a great question. I’m sure I could come up with other ideas but since I like massage porn and I think the girls should have a real orgasm on camera, I’d probably do something like that. 2 or 3 guys massage a girl and slowly lead into them touching and licking her focusing on her having an orgasm or two. Then sex with them including one or all cumming inside of her internally somewhere. Maybe one anally, one vagina and one in her mouth. I think this is more like a real sex scenario if this scene took place in real life and that seeing the girl having a real authentic orgasm without all the crazy screaming and fake dirty talk would be hot.
I’d be grateful if you could help me with an issue I’ve been battling on: Watching porn. Any time I search about it I only read negative stuff like the bad effects etc. Do you really think its so bad? I’m currently 30 daysish off porn I’ve done these pauses multiple times now and I never seem to fully stick to it. What do you think?
Read your story from an unbiased perspective and I started to catch things that seemed familiar. At one point, your story sounded very similar to my ex, Sarah whom I wrote about. I know you’re not, certain things don’t add up and the time line is about 15 year off. Just fascinating to her a different version of a similar story told from another point of view. Thanks for posting your story, excellent read and I’ll add that while this was more clinical and non-erotic than normal, it was still good.
I’m probably ill-equipped to answer this but I will try. First, what effects have you noticed? How much does watching porn dominate your life? I think if you watch or think about porn a majority of the time instead of living life that isn’t healthy. But if it is a release or helps you to think about fantasies sometimes, there is nothing wrong with that. I don’t watch a lot of porn but do sometimes. My boyfriend does more (including a few of my scenes) but he’s not doing it as a replacement for me unless I’m not around. We have a long distance relationship so it actually helps with that. I know some say they avoid porn because of the abuse that takes place in porn. Well sure it’s out there. I think you should consume porn based on the ethic shooting of the scenes or from production companies that treat their people with respect. For example, you don’t avoid buying any puppy just because a percentage are abused or born in puppy mills. You should look to support agencies and companies that are humane. Maybe not the best example. I’d be happy to try to help since you seem torn. Just let me know a bit more and ask any questions you have.
Hi there, one more quick question if you are still commenting: " I found out later that he definitely put something in my drink. The scene was a blur and I don’t remember a lot of it." I have seen a few videos in the past where a certain porn company would drive the girls around in a van and have sex with them. In several of those videos, the girls are always drinking something out of a red "party cup." My question: would you happen to know anything about this as a general practice? Obviously your experience is not a regular thing, and the guy who did it was properly dealt with, but is "loosening up" the girls’ inhibitions with these drinks a normal thing in the industry otherwise?
Oh no. I’m not at all negatively affected (At least that’s what I think) it’s just reading about all the effects online etc just makes me paranoid AF. I used to use it to get off and nothing fetishy. The most insane would be threesomes but nothing special. The thing is I know how people like to bash everything and write negative articles but I found nothing positive. Literally nothing…
I have no doubt my story is not unique. I thought about going into the erotic side of what happened but decided to just focus on the other view of what it’s like to decide to take the leap into porn. It’s my gone wild story and I guess I made it PG. It definitely wasn’t PG. Just for timeline purposes, this happened during 2011 and 2012. 15 years ago I was 9 years old so wasn’t me. lol If you have a link for Sarah’s story, send it to me. I’d like to read it.
I think you have to look at people behavior versus what they say. The numbers don’t lie in that a lot of people watch porn. By watching they are supporting porn. If it wasn’t being supported, it wouldn’t exist or be as popular as it is. There is still a stigma attached to porn. My understanding is previous generations were different. But look at the influence porn has had. A majority of younger females shave or trim their pubic area due to porn. Anal sex and sex with more than one partner is more popular because of porn. Being more open sexually is due to porn. Is there a line that shouldn’t be crossed? That’s not for me to decide. I have a line I don’t want to cross but that’s for each of us to decide. The media and conservative groups draw the line somewhere else publicly, but I’ve met these conservative types at private parties and in their personal life most are consumers of porn. The best thing I can tell you is to make up your own mind. Don’t cave to pear pressure or media pressure. Do what makes you happy.
I don’t really care for what most people do. Lots of kids say swag. Lots of guys treat women like shit. I mean knowing the actual positive and negative affects that aren’t bias BS. Supporting porn isn’t in my best interest just feeling good and stuff
I don’t think drugging girls is any part of a general practice. But I had a very narrow view of this in a different country. From the little bit that I’ve talked to girls that were in porn in the US, this was never brought up. I often had a drink or two to calm my nerves and relax but I was never offered something except that one time that I didn’t open myself. In hindsight I made a mad decision and should have known better. But I was an emotional mess and wasn’t thinking clearly. Live and learn. Having said all of this, I think are other ways you sort of get hooked or things that are done to make it attractive or to make you let your guard down. For a lot of girls it’s the instant attention or a level of fame that comes very quickly. I was invited to parties with VIP’s before and after I shot my first scene and I went from nobody to somebody at least in that little world. Guys and men of power that wanted to talk to me and have sex with me. (No, I didn’t have sex with them). It’s intoxicating. For some it was the money and freedom that lowered their inhibitions. Or the constant compliments about how hot and desired you are and then of course the sexual experiences. You are matched up with some pretty good looking guys sometimes that know their way around a female body. Even the shooting of a scene itself is enticing since we want to be a part of something and wanted and to feel attractive and popular. All of these things knock down those inhibitions or did for me and other girls I knew. I know this is more than you asked for but I wanted to illustrate that there are other things that hook people into wanting to do porn.
I tried to offer an unbiased view including the good and the bad. But I can only speak to my experiences with no agenda. Good luck with your journey.
Thanks a lot and GL with your boyfriend and I hope you have the best of lives :)
/r/NSFWIAMA would love you.
I would like to think that I would enjoy watching the videos, and only because I would want to become more intimate with you. If we watched them together, I could ask what you liked and didn’t like, or the sort. That way we may be able to have a better sexual relationship. But that is all theory, and I don’t know how I would feel if in that position. But good for you, and congrats on the not so terrifying experience!
Out of curiosity, what’s the procedure if the guy cums prematurely? Or does that almost never happen? Do you wait, then continue, and it is edited out?
lol… I’ll keep that in mind.
There was a video on Buzzfeed that was pretty funny. It was something like "porn stars watch their own video with other people". It was well done and showed how normal most of us are. I had a few fans I’ve answered questions for when they watched videos. There is a female I became pretty close to since she was interested in maybe trying porn. She could very much read my mind during the scenes like what I was thinking and feeling. It was actually fun to hear her talk about it. I think females can read other females pretty well.
That documentary "Hot Girls Wanted" had me pretty annoyed. They tried to make it seem like girls were being duped and exploited and abused. When you watch some scenes or hear some pornstars speak, it’s clear that Rashida Jones had some bias and agenda that she was portraying in that documentary. There were points to be made but it definitely wasn’t done objectively.
I completely agree. Plus they were probably selective to only show some sound bytes that supported their position. It’s what motivated me to speak up a little.
Glad you did. Hopefully more people see your post.
In your experience, did you find the industry greatly favors females more than males? I know Ron Jeremy has gone on record saying that, unless you’re one of the top 3 or 4 guys in the industry, the pay is not much more above what you would get if you worked a minimum wage service job.
I heard that was the case. I got more than a few other unknown girls since I was American. Some of the guys that I performed with have turned to gay porn or left the industry because of money.
Oh shit, it would be amazing to watch a porn video with the actress. Just not when she is my gf. Once I talked to an actress on twitter and she sent me a video and asked me how I liked it. Strangely that was one of the few times when I didn’t have a boner from porn. lol
Shades of Belle de Jour here…
That Buzzfeed video was really funny. I loved the reaction of everyone. So cute.
Yes, I have heard that is a common route for most male performers. Thank you very much for your answer. Did you keep copies of your scenes? Or have they all been uploaded to the Internet? Does the potential that someone you know that might stumble across them ever worry you?
I had some of the DVDs but got rid of them when I moved. My dad almost found them as he was helpimg me move and it wasn’t worth the risk. A fan pulled together all the digital copies and sent them to me though. I don’t think anyone has stumbled across my scenes and figured out it was me. But some have tracked me down after seeing them. A few times people have put my real name out there which isn’t cool. luckily I have a common name and there was a porn star that went by my real name. Lol.
Oliver Strelly is one I know did gay porn and I had quite a few scenes with him.
Wow, that sounds very hot! I’d watch it!
You ever have the guy cum too soon inside you and them have edit it out?
Yes. A new guy that lost control within a few minutes. The scene was never finished.
I would think it is a more common problem.
My understanding is that getting and staying hard are more of the issue. That was what I saw too. The scenes that are shot straight through with no stopping are easier but some scenes can take a few hours to shoot with a lot of stopping and starting. This is done for several reasons including rest, adding of lube, to rest or to set up for the next position. Guys definitely have it worse than us girls since all we really need is lube if we aren’t excited enough or are doing anal.
Yes that makes sense. I always figured their had to be breaks. I can’t imagine have to last near 45 minutes every time
Some of the scenes they did. I was usually pretty worn out by that time too especially if it was with two guys. Being in good shape really helped me.
That sounds tiring. Yeah save that for ye special sex
I just watched it, the second video with women is so funny!! http://www.buzzfeed.com/mikerose/people-watch-porn-next-to-porn-stars#.steMAQpAv
Thank you.
Couple of questions. 1) You say lots of people are not on hard drugs, but how prevalent are stuff like alcohol / weed? Do porn stars show up drunk to shoot and is that totally cool, or is it like a normal job where it’s like "do whatever you want on your own time but don’t come to work drunk"? 2) While you were in the industry, did you date other guys and if so, what did they think? Did you become more sexually adventurous in your personal life? You said you were never a one-night-stand person – did you do that kind of stuff in your personal life, and are you like that now? 3) Did you mostly hang out with your pre-porn friends while you were working in porn or with other people in the industry? Did anything really change between you and your friends?
Great questions. I can only speak to my experience so others may have had other experiences. 1. The people I performed with weren’t really into drugs. There was some social drinking and a little bit of smoking. But most of the people I was with were fairly fit or into fitness. 2. I didn’t date anyone then really. I went out on a few dates but didn’t tell them. It was super casual though and no sex. It did make me be more sexually adventurous in my personal life. But it was within the bounds of a relationship. I’m much more comfortable sexually than I was before I did anything in porn so that has helped me now. 3. Because I was in a different country when I performed, everybody I met was new to me. My friends during that time were mostly all in the industry or knew about it. Most of my friends do not know now but I am not super close to anyone because I’ve moved a few times since college.
Sorry to necro this a bit, but I actually got here while looking at information about Hot Girl Wanted. Just wanted to know, how did the guys tend to treat you? And did most of them have like a "character" in the scene, or is that how they actually behaved on their own time? For instance the two guys you saw outside of work, was there a lot of difference in their intimacy? Thanks so much for posting about this! Insightful and really helpful.
The guys were different outside of scenes. Definitely more normal.