My first day on a onling dating site (in the "naughty" section) I get a "flirt" from a guy and he has a picture and his profile catches my eye because he has, like, an 8 pack and it includes a requisite cock shot and boy is that beautiful and big as well. His profile says he loves to pleasure a woman, has a high sex drive, likes to take his time, cum many times each time and oh yeah he's well endowed. And he doesn't like quickies or one night stands. He's close to my age and taller. Hmmm. So I respond to his smile and we start to email back and forth…something like this:
Me: “Sorry for not responding sooner…I was overwhelmed with messages and it was my first time on the site. I am looking for someone who can keep up with my voracious appetite so I am intrigued by your profile. Perhaps we can chat sometime?” (I've never done this before but figured that sounded good…).
Him: “I am sure I can handle your appetite, I always wake up with a massive hard on and go to bed with one as well. If you want to chat you can reach me at…”
We text a bit back and forth and he’s busy then I’m busy and we never talk on the phone. And he’s a pretty steady communicator (albeit not that frequent). We set a date to meet at a little pub near my house.
So I show up – he’s on time – and he says “Hey” and my first thought is “WTF this is not the same guy…what do I do”. But I’m dressed up and I’m out and I have to have dinner anyway so why not, I figure I'll give him a chance. So he's kinda awkward at first and the conversation doesn't flow very well. I'm asking him lots of questions to keep things going. I note that he nurses his beer instead of rapidly downing it as I am with my glass of wine since I'm a bit nervous. Keep in mind this is only my second date after becoming single.
Physically he looks nothing like the dude in the photo. He's got a seriously receeding hairline, missing a tooth (!), glasses, very slight paunch (not bad…just not what I expected). Basically if he approached me at a bar in my shallow phase I would not be interested. at. all.
But over dinner I discover he's smart and has an interesting background and is just slow to get warmed up in conversation. He knows what's going on in the world and he's got a wicked sense of humor like me. He pays and then asks what I'd like to do next. It's the moment of truth. I remember – no word of a lie – that cock shot and think hmmm…there are some things that won't change over time. And he was nice and patient and smart and all those other things. So I say "hey why don't we get a drink at my place". Done and done.
So…we go into my kitchen and I'm a bit nervous and being all busy with getting a drink and he grabs my arm and pulls me to him and he kisses me. Fantastic kisser…hands everywhere, pulling me into him and I can feel how strong he actually is. I kinda melt right there and then.
We are kissing in my kitchen and in about three minutes I am soaking wet and dying to take him upstairs. He gladly obliges. If I was writing a book I would spend many many pages on the next section. Let's put it like this…we went to my place at about 10pm. We are still fucking at 4am. I've lost count of how many orgasms I've had. He can literally cum multiple times and he just. keeps. going. Each session is about 30-45 minutes. Then we lay in bed and talk and laugh until he gets that look in his eye (or me in mine) and we kiss and there is he, ready again to go. I ask him to sleep over night (I know, I know…breaking all these "friends with benefits" rules…but it was SO SO SO good I just wanted more).
I fall asleep and wake up the next morning in his arms…totally entwined together. Within seconds of his waking up he's kissing me again, all over, and we have sex three times before we go downstairs for coffee. We have sex after that. And again. We have lunch together at a place up the street because we are starving (surprise!) and need energy. He doesn't leave until 4pm and by then we have had sex 15 times. No exaggeration. I mean really, that's like 18 months of my marriage.
~Ann Ann St.Vincent
Source: reddit.com/r/gonewildstories/comments/37bzfd/a_first_date_that_turned_into_a_sex_marathon
Nice try, guy who wants women to believe awkward, balding, overweight, toothless men are secretly sex machines.
Lol nope, I’m very much female. You can read my blog if you don’t believe me. And this was absolutely the exception to the norm…but a lesson for me that sometimes, sex machines come in unlikely packages.
I suppose if I was going to make a sex machine I would definitely not put it in the package I experienced on that date. Why not have it all?
Were you miffed he posted fake pics? (Maybe not bec. you fucked him 15 times but really… wtf is up with the fake pics?!)
At first, yes. But I quickly realized he couldn’t really face the fact that we wasn’t the 6-packed hottie he used to be. I felt bad for him. He was a also a veteran suffering from PTSD and also one of the sweetest guys I’d ever dated. But ultimately, just not the right guy for me. I guess I’ve been lucky in that most of the people I’ve met have looked reasonably like their pictures. I know that’s not always the case.
Oh okay… that makes more sense now. :)
I’ve always tried to be understanding of why someone does what they do – even when it’s deceitful or douchbag behaviour. Doesn’t make it better, but at least I understand it!
That’s a good attitude to have. Not everything is in black or white. :)