I felt my entire esophagus trembling as I tried to suck the air slowly in. My airway burned and it didn't matter how many times I drank just one more glass of water, my throat was going dry.
"If I go, you promise not to give up?"
"No way. " I held Elise by her arms. If she left, I would start to run and not stop until I got home.
"Mina, eventually we will have to split up. Unless you want me to stay here for the whole thing" she laughed "and I don't think you will".
"This was a bad idea".
""Bad" is still being a virgin at 23".
"This was a very very bad idea."
"Stop being so catastrophic, Mina. It doesn't suit you."
I opened my andry eyes towards her. Doesn't suit me? Being catastrophic is probably the only thing I know how to do right.
"Yeah, right." She shook her head, smiling "Maybe it suits you a little bit. But it will be all right. You just need to breathe. And try to stop sweating."
"Oh my God! Am I sweating too much? I am, ain't I?"
"Mina! I was joking!"
But it was too late, I was already inside the bathroom, sticking toilet paper under my arms when Elise followed me. I was beginning to hear a bit of annoyance in her voice. Her patience was running out.
"If you don't want to do this, we'll just go. I mean, you'll go. I'll stay."
"I just wanted one third of your selfconfidence."
"You were raised by your grandfather. There is a reason behind the expression "raised by grandparents", you know?"
"It was only my grandfather, not "grandparents"." I corrected her, but only a very small piece of my mind could focus on the conversation. The rest of me was too busy freaking out.
"Worse. Honey, listen to me! Men do it all the time. Most of them lose their virginity exactly like this."
"Oh, Elise. But shouldn't it be special?"
"It should. But… It also have happened about four years ago, so relax! You no longer obey the female pattern, anyway."
"Tell me! Tell me the list again!"
"Oh my God, Mina, I feel like beating you up."
" Just tell me the list!"
"You know what's your problem? You learned how to be a woman through those women's magazines that you collect. I swear they have numbers for everything."
"Elise, please!"
"12 Quick Diets and good health practices." she sang with a commercial voice "23 Ways to be sexy with old clothes. – she kept a plastic smile on her face as she chanted the imaginary headlines."
"You're not helping."
"50 Ways to make Elise go crazy. 102 ways to die a virgin. You have to stop listing things!"
"Just this once! I promise!"
She expired long and hard, rubbed her temples and then turned to me.
"I've done it before and it's no big deal." she raised her index finger "You are stressing too much over this and if you keep waiting for mr. right you'll end up waiting for the rest of your life." Middle finger "Better to do it with a professional who knows what he is doing and will focus on doing something good for you, instead of doing it with some random guy who will just want to come fast and leave faster." Another finger "If it's your decision, you won't have reason to regret it." Another finger "If you lose your virginity already, you will calm down, relax and your second time can be more special than any first time." Elise raised her thumb and I knew the count was over "It will hurt like hell and you won't have an orgasm anyway." she added mumbling.
"Oh!" And that was it … every drop of confidence that the list had given me was completely annihilated with that one last comment. "What happens if it hurts?"
"If it hurts, it hurts, Mina. Grow up!"
"Do I take something?"
"Contraception pills. And the plan B pill, afterwards, if the condom bursts."
"Not that! Something for the pain, Elise!"
"Oh my God! Have you gone crazy? It's sex, not torture."
"It's illegal! What if the police show up, what do I do?"
"We've talked abou this. It's not illegal… But even if it was, you'd just get arrested. What else?"
I was two seconds away from going terribly sick.
"Seriously." She took me by the arms in a quiet affection. "You need to calm down. Nothing bad will happen. You will lose your virginity, pay the guy and then we'll go out and you get you a boyfriend who will not leave because of this."
"I'm not doing this because of Michel!"
"I know, I know. Michel was an idiot who just wanted sex. We can find you a guy who really likes you, but make no mistake, dear, whoever he is, he will also want sex."
"Oh, God … " I had my hand on my forehead "How will I ever tell my daughter this story?"
"Mina, I swear it… you deserve being slaped in the face. If you don't get over it and learn how to do this, the possibility of having a daughter is inexistent, you know? So why don't we worry about one thing at a time?"
She looked at her watch.
"Matt is always on time, which means he'll knock on my bedroom door in thirty seconds. I have to go, now."
I found it amazing how Elise was able to talk so intimately about the male prostitute with who she encountered time and time again. He was a man she paid for sex. And it was not like she needed it.
I took a deep breath.
Truth be told, neither of us needed it. But Elise was a magnet for selfish men and she said that, lately, Matt was the only one who could make her come. And as for myself … well … I was a whole different case. It's not like I'd never found myself locked in a room with a guy. I did… It was the "take the clothes off" barrier that I never seemed able to overcome.
Elise gave me a kiss on the cheek and left. As the door closed behind her, I forgot all the reasons why doing this was a good idea to begin with.
Fate, however, took charge so I wouldn't have to second guess myself for long. A firm and fast knock on the door and I knew my date for the night had arrived.
I took deep breath. And again. Once more.
He knocked again. I turned the knob and tried to smile.
He was handsome. In a quiet and shy way that was not at all what I expected. His blond hair had been cut very short. His brown eyes had something friendly and pleasant. Part of me was happy: it would be easier to be comfortable with a normal good looking man than with some god-like gorgeous member of the human race. But part of me was slightly disappointed: if I was doing this with a normal man, then I should have just gone to a bar, right? Instead of letting Elise convince me to commit an "almost crime"?
He wore a white shirt, black pants dark and a tydi tie. He opened his mouth to say something, but I decided that if I was to say anything, I would likely just stutter, confuse myself, stop breathing, start sweating and, most probably, faint. So if I was doing it, then I would just do it.
I put my arms around his neck and kissed him. It was possible that I was using too much tongue or saliva … But his hands were in my hair and I thought I ought to be doing something right.
I let go of the kiss and intended to pull him inside the bedroom. But how to do it? By the hand? Hand would be too delicate. By the tie? Yes! The tie would be a good idea. I was carressing the dark fabric of the tie comming down his chest when I heard three words escape his unbelieving lips.
"Room Service?"
Was he asking me or telling me?
His hand went up to the hallway to my left and I realized he was telling me.
I was very close to developing Parkinson, Alzheimer, cancer or any other terminal illness that would make me require some sort of treatment far far away. My brain examined the clothes he was wearing and I saw the golden plaque, with his name written, stuck in the white shirt. Thanks so much for being late to the party, brain.
"Good night." His eyes had strayed to something down the hall.
I turned my face in the direction he faced and saw the room service cart with a delicate white towel covering its items and, behind it, the most magnificent god-like gorgeous member ofthe human race I had ever encountered.
"Mina Bault?" he asked.
He was a good eight inches taller than me. Strong in a way that makes you wonder what is underneath his clothes. His dark, unkempt hair, falling over his perfect face and a square chin. His beard was very well done and the only thing that pierced me more than his intense green eyes was the smile of amusement that he had stamped across his face.
"Will your friend be joining us?"
I looked up to the waiter and forced myself to take a deep breath.
"No, I …" I just have a habit of kissing strangers in the middle of the hallway "I was just …"
"Warming up?" he asked and I wanted to die.
"And you are …?" I offered my hand to shake his. Great, Mina. You make out with the waiter and pours out formality on the male prostitute. Congrats, girl.
"You can call me Ryker."
"Ryker." It was quite impossible that I could embarrass myself any more that evening and this thought gave me the determination I needed "Why don't you come in?"
I was being more formal with the man I was going to pay to make love to me than to customers at work. Way to go, Mina …
He approached and I got undecided wether to let him in through the right or left and I ended up not letting him pass me at all. Ryker held me by my arms and made me decide for one side as he came inthrough the other. I think I would have an orgasm just allow this night to be over. The single thought of sending the male prostitute away and finish that humiliation would be an infinite pleasure.
"I didn't order room service."
"Oh, sorry. But it says so right here." He checked on his order "Elise Benoit, room 1206."
I bit my lip, exhausted. I didn't know if Elise had sent this to me on purpose or if she got the rooms mixed up.
"Well, let's see what it is."
"I was ordered to leave it inside the room with …"
I pulled out the white linen cloth over the cart. I saw a delicate brown basket supported on the metal surface. The strips of wood curled making a firm handle holding a considerable size compartment. What was in there, I could only imagine. I could only recognize one item: the long pink thing that stretched out of the wooden receptacle was, without a doubt, a dildo. The damned basket should be filled with all kinds of kinky, many of which I certainly would not even be able identify, let alone use. On top of all, attached by a colorful and glossy paper lace was a huge card with the words "Good first fuck, girlfriend," followed by an outrageous amount of exclamations points. I simply had to stop thinking that the night could not get any worse. I was clearly wrong.
I was lost between looking at the waiter and deciding what to do with the basket for too many seconds. Ryker came to the door, certainly curious as to what caused our sudden silence.
"Wow!" he laughed. I was glad to know at least one of us was having fun. Because the waiter, as I, seemed to be walking towards a hopeless stroke. "You came prepared." he joked.
"My friend has a not very understandable sense of humor." I explained to the waiter. I was very generous with his tip, even though no amount of money would be able to erase that night of his mind.
Ryker took the basket into the room.
It was nice that he had took the initiative because between me and the waiter, that damned thing was going to stay there in the hallway forever.
"You're embarrassed." He said as he dropped the basket on the table.
You don't say …
"It's just because it's …" I scratched my neck. There was no way of saying these words in a way they wouldn't seem weird.
"Is this your first time?"
I felt my shoulders falling heavily around me when I exhaled in withdrawal.
"I'm guessing not a lot of women do this, right? Lose their virginity to …" I gestured toward hin and let the words hang in the air.
"More than you think." he smiled.
"For real?" Now, with the door closed, I began to feel calmer. I mean… I was not ready to meditate, or anything. But I was less desperate, now.
"You'd be surprised with how abnormal normality is."
"Normality is abnormal?" I laugh at its absurdity and with my heart beating a little slower I could begin to grasp how yummy my date for the night really was.
"Write down on a piece of paper everything that defines a normal person. Everything. And I dare you to go out and find that person." he shrugged "No one is normal. Normal is weird." he smiled and I wanted to melt. "You can think about someone else while we do this, if you prefer." he explained "If you want to think about a boyfriend, or ex-boyfriend as I touch you. There is no problem. You can even call me by another name if you want."
This was getting too weird.
"But is it okay if I call you Ryker?"
"Sure." he nodded "I just want you to understand that the night is yours." He reached out and touched my arms again. But this time there was something different in his touch. Something intense. "We will do whatever you want. Just as you want it. Nothing more and nothing less."
Ryker wrapped his arms around my waist and I started thinking that this actually a great idea. I never had a boyfriend like that. Strong and huge. It was interesting to be held by a man like that. He kissed my neck and bit my ear. I pushed my butt back involuntarily pushing my body against his. His hands reached my neck and his fingers were in my hair. I wanted to touch his body, but I was afraid to do the wrong thing and end up stopping the delicious path of kisses he was drawing from my shoulder to my neck. His teeth were on my chin and I felt a pang at the bottom of my stomach. I looked down, startled, and saw his erection.
Yep.
That would not work.
It just wouldn't, wouldn't and wouldn't.
Ryker pulled my bottom lip between his teeth but I was hyperaware of my surroundings. I kept my eyes open and stop breathing.
I wanted to beat myself up.
What was my problem?
"Do you have any preferences?" he whispered, stroking my nose with his. "You want me to talk? Or would you rather if I was quiet? Any place where you prefer to be touched or somewhere you don't like to?"
I had no idea what I liked.
Maybe he thought I was a virgin where penetration is regard. But I was a virgin in all ways. There was very little I knew or had experienced. Wow … I had only seen a naked man once. And when that happened I had an absurd fit of laughter and it was just downhill from then on.
"I don't … I don't know."
"All right." He gave me a wet time consuming kiss on the cheek and my face was tingling where his where his lips had touched me "We'll find out."
He took a step back to take away his shirt. I mentally thanked him for his gesture. If we were to get naked, I'd really prefer it if he'd go first. Just the idea of being naked in front of a dressed man gave me chills. Bad kind of chills.
"You wanna try it?" he smile, indicating his own belt.
Wait, what? He wanted me to take his clothes off?
I swallowed.
"Or you can just watch me do it."
Yeah, that's it. Just watch. I prefer it. Thanks.
Ryker was in his underwear in front of me.
I felt like cursing.
In fact, I wanted to shout it.
I've never seen a man so prefectly drawn in my life. It seemed like he was photoshoped.
Without meaning to, he pulled his shorts down a little when he stripped his pants and I found myself looking at the line along his underwear where his hair began to appear.
"You want me to take it off already?" he lifted my face, touchin my chin, and I was sure my face had turned into a traitor tone of red. He was laughing in a blatant way that made me about eighteen times more ashamed.
He tilted his head and looked at me with a squeezed smile. Was he waiting for me to respond?
What were my options? Saying "Yeah, that's what I want, baby, take it all off"? Yep … Like I was able to say those words out loud.
No way.
I opened my mouth and waited for some divine grace to delight my lips with the gift of speech.
But as miracles are not a thing to happen in my life I just stood there, with my stupid face and my awful silence in front of the half-naked man. The only difference is that my mouth was worsening the situation, opening and closing in a silent monologue.
Ryker still waited politely for some time.
And when I say "politely" I mean having fun with my unhealthy degree of shyness.
I took control of my mouth and got to mutter:
"Whatever is best for you."
Whatever is best for him…. He is a male prostitute, Mina. He probably prefers to get paid and leave.
"I'd rather you come here and take it off then." his face changed and I saw his manly squared features take an authoritative tone.
He should be testing various fields to see what I preferred. See what made me excited.
But that was one scenario I did not like and I thought I'd warn him.
"I don't like it like this. Man being bossy, or hiting me … none of that, okay?"
I saw it in his eyes. The feeling that he was trying to be sexy and I was doing my very best not to let him.
If he had picked me up in a bar, he would be laughing by now. He would be putting his clothes back on, laughing and saying goodbye as to make it clear that I am hopeless.
"All right." He pulled me close to his body again and, I believe, for lack of knowing what to do with me, started to kill me again.
I wanted to liven things up.
I wanted to be excited! It never happened to me. As Elise said, I always mixed excitement with nervousness and every time I was almost getting naked with a man I mixed carnal desire with the anxiety you get on the eve before an important exam. And that was the point where I began to babble meaningless things and reorganize my thoughts through listings. As if practicing for the questions on an exam.
Elise knew me too well.
It was almost as if she were me, but in another body.
Couldn't she lose my virginity for me? It would be great if she could.
Okay, Mina! Just drop it! You can not go back home a virgin today. Enough! It's about time!
Do something!
I began to kiss him back, but I was fully aware of my awkward and not at all seductive kisses.
Grab his manhood, Mina!
I had never done it before.
I'd seen a naked man, but I'd never touched his nakedness.
Okay, come on. I can do this.
I let my hands down all the way to his underwear and felt his hair and his warmth. It was hard to one side and I fumbled his erection.
Okay, now what? What do I do?
I was kissing the man and felt his erect penis in my hand. I closed my hand around a portion of the member and I kept my hand there, waiting. Waiting for something to happen.
He moved his hips and I thought it would be interesting to move the hand. I'm not stupid. I know how a man masturbates. But knowing how he does it and doing it for him are two very different things.
Ryker put his hand over mine and at that point I was more wanting it all to end than to begin. Confusing excitement with anxiety before an exam.
Damn Elise, who knew me so well.
It was just that.
I could not relax and enjoy the moment. All I could think about was what was he doing and what was he going to do next.
"You can touch me anywhere." he suggested.
Does this meant that he is liking what I'm doing now? Is it possible.
The testicles!
Men like having their testicles rubbed, don't they?
I took my hand between his thighs, looking for the right place to massage. I was unable to see, and with my experience, the touch was not completely reliable. But I found a part that seemed appropriate and pressed him there.
I just wanted to massage it… seduce him.
But I had his balls in my fist and he moaned in a weird way before pulling away from me.
His face was very red when he took his hands to the groin.
Oh, crap. I had pressed too hard.
Someone, please, kill me now.
I gelded the male prostitute.
"Oh my goodness!" I took my hands to my mouth. "Ryker! I'm sorry!"
He sat on the bed, bent over, with his hands protecting his groin. Protecting them from me, obviously.
I ran to Elise's kinky basket. Something in there would have to serve.
If she did not put some sort of ointment for pain in there, to be used in case the woman squeezed a sensitive part of man too hard, she clearly did not know me very well.
A red tube written "thermal gel" promised to cool the skin when applied and I didn't think twice.
"Here! This will make it better."
I started to massage the erection – waning under the circumstances – when Ryker grabbed my hands and pulled the tube.
"Is that strawberry?"
"I don't know."
The tube was red. I looked at the packaging and saw that it brought a tiny drawing of a strawberry just below the brand name.
I didn't understand. Why was it important to knowe the taste? He didn't want me to do oral sex on him, did he? Because I was not ready for that! Particularly, not with a male prostitute.
"I'm allergic to strawberries!"
He got up and ran to the shower.
I stood alone in the middle of the room trying to go over the events.
One would imagine that Elise supposed that, for one reason or another, I'd give up losing my virginity today. But when I told to her, in details, the events of the night, I doubted even she would believe at first.
I opened my wallet and took the amount enough for two hours worth of payment.
We had not been together for thirty minutes. But I had probably destroyed any chances Ryker had of fathering a child, not to mention the damage to his working tool.
I put a fat tip over the notes already at the counter and grabbed my things.
I could imagine that a long time from now I would look back and laugh at that situation.
But it would have to be a very long time from now.
Today, I did not want to stay there for one more second.
First chapter of my new book! Thoughts?
Source: reddit.com/r/sexystories/comments/2yzjgw/shameless_str8_prost_virgin
I love the writing and the humor in the story. I hope to see more from you!