So, I haven't written in a while and, holy crackers, has it been a whirlwind four months! Not so much whilrling in a traveling-lots-of-places-way but more of a radical-changes-in-my-life way.
It began when I answered an ad on craigslist for a housekeeper. Of course, I need the money, but I also just need to stay busy. When I called the number listed, the man who answered seemed pleasant enough and suggested we meet at Starbucks (a public place – thank you for being concerned about making me feel safe) to go over the details of the job.
I walked into the coffee shop and looked around for a red-haired man (!!) with a beard. I smiled when I saw the only ginger in the place because he was also really cute!
We talked about expectations and timing and I'm not even sure what all else but we were there for three hours! Something in that meeting and first conversation lit and opened something for me. It wasn't a "click" so much as a feeling of relief. Let me see if I can explain… I've had great friends in various situations all my life. I have NO problem meeting people and holding conversations – it's kind of a skill/talent actually. But when Dan (that's his name) and I began to interact and converse, if felt like all my other conversations had been through windows with the blinds down but tilted open, and I didn't even realize it. This, now, felt like the blinds were yanked up and the window was lifted as high as possible. Such and ease and back-and-forth banter! Who laughs with a man they just met who is seeking cleaning services?? Apparently me. :)
So we made plans for my first cleaning event. He said that he'd arrive home near the end of my session and would check in with me then.
His home is one of those older brick homes that smells of wood and memories. Old, but not musty old, with decor from a grandmotherly type who clearly cared. But there was a LOT to clean. I worked. HARD.
When Dan came home, the same chemical connection picked right back up as he led me from room to room inspecting. He was pleased. I was thrilled. He asked me to stay for dinner.
My heart jumped as it had been a while since a man had had his hands on me. I wasn't sure of his intent – it wasn't clear. It was very clear to me, though, that I wanted to be around him more. So I did. I stayed for dinner. We laughed and talked and that was it. He gave me a quick hug as I left and reminded me of the date of the following week's cleaning. Hmmmm. Yep. That was it. I was confused but happy. I usually have no trouble attracting men…
Well, what has transpired since then is that this cleaning lady/boss relationship has quickly transformed into a friendship that, in a short four months, is probably the deepest of my life.
I stopped accepting payment for the cleaning services – it began to feel dirty to do so – because he has also done several jobs and favors for me.
We are together, Dan and I, ALLTHE TIME. We work on projects together. We exercise together. We relax together. I cook for him, and I'm learning sooo many good healthy recipes! I do his laundry. We even review our days with each other every night whether I'm there or not.
It feels like everything you would have in a long-term relationship expect for my favorite part – SEX!
Actually, I'm not even sure if that is my favorite part anymore – my ranking system feels skewed of late. I just know that I miss it. A lot.
I know it would be amazing with him – I've spend plenty of time studying his form and thinking about how we would fit together. We are very comfortable with each other physically even to the point of napping together and laying on each other to watch movies on the couch.
And the words he tells me… Whew! I know he thinks I'm beautiful. He's said as much over and over. But this feels like a really close friendship. So hard to tell.
I am not discontent, on the contrary, I'm very content spending time with him. I feel like we are both better people for having met each other – even in four months time.
This no-sex part remains a mystery. I know he's not gay. He tells me about other women he's had sex with. Just not sure why he hasn't wanted it with me.
Well, this is also what I know. This man is amazing, and I can't wait to see where our friendship goes. I'm ready.
Please see sister post: http://www.reddit.com/r/Erotica/comments/2v0jdq/not_celibate/