This is absolutely crazy, I thought to myself as the lump in my throat grew. Insane, crazy, reckless, irresponsible…The mental list trailed off. I surveyed my current situation: I was a grown woman in my mid 30s who had agreed to attend a sex party. It was something my coworkers and friends would never have imagined I would do. Hell, I still couldn’t believe I was doing it either! Yet here I was: shaved and plucked, washed and dried, make up perfectly aligned, and dressed in a slutty black dress and too-tight high heels looking the part perfectly. The fact that I was attending the party was part of my excitement but it wasn’t what had me feeling like I was being marched to the firing squad. You see, I was the party.