Hermaphrotitties, Author at NSFW story

That time I’m going to get fired

Cold open

Interior, sitting room, high end flat, London, England.

Time, indeterminate.

Rick standing next to Morty, laughing wryly, holding his flask, he has clearly been caught post spit take.

Morty "What?" in disbelief.

Sir Arthur Conan Doyle sitting back in his recliner, smug. we cannot see his right arm.

Time indeterminate.

Rick and Morty have subtly switched places to match (ref 01a)

Rick is drinking actively from his flask.

Doyle "I had no idea the eastern european stock had such low class proclivities."

Time indeterminate

Camera angle reveals Doyle has a tied off needle in his until now hidden arm. Character positions (ref 02a)

Roll Title

Oops, this isn't erotica. This is so when this episode airs you can raise your fist to the heavens and say that fucking lesbian spoiled the best joke in the damn thing.

She Hulk

The attitude.

The shining edge of a blade at rest, surgically precise but more than willing to butcher if needed.

The figure.

The hard, long, lean muscles earned one step at a time.

The costume.

Form fitting sports bra and matching black boy shorts with hot pink trim.

The hair.

Green. Duh.

The confidence.

Nestled between the pert bosom heavily rests a P226: SIG Sauer semi automatic pistol.

It is a shockingly functional piece of pure masculine industrial design. Every possible aesthetic feature sacrificed to become a thing bent on purpose.

I used to think I was going to kill myself with it. Instead it set me free. It's name is "Little Freebie" because its so concealable.

It is there as a final option because we live in a world of finality.

In the end no amount of being pretty will stop a bullet and I can help no one dead.

I am pretty (shut up) but if you ever see little freebie, you know I'm done being pretty.

More tommorrow!

Lots of love!

That time Spoole couldn’t handle the dankness of my pussy weed

Manicured fingers strained against too tight spandex jogging shorts, worming their way impatiently into smooth, yielding flesh . . .

"Touch James without my permission and I will cut those titular titties right off."

The surprise forced out of me, in order, the sound of a dying chipmunk, more pee than I'm willing to admit and finally, an eighth of an ounce of the dankest indica sativa hybrid I have ever had the honor of hiding in my snatch.

"You bitch! I thought you were Spoole perving out on me again!".

I petulantly over enunciated as I hastily pulled my shorts back up and dropped to my knees toward the toilette.

"Are you sure you want to come out of the gate ripping off Broad City?"

Elyse was wearing exactly the tee shirt that, according to James, he had been looking for

"Not ten minutes ago!".

lol

I had recommended against the pajama bottoms but what do I know about color theory, I went to The Corcoran school of art, Elyse.

It's a school where they teach you art, Elyse.

I know you are reading this Elyse, I'm coming for the pajamas. Read more »

That time I bragged about being able to deep throat for the wrong reason

I am a hermaphrodite who grew up thinking I was a boy. Adolescence was a confusing time for me to say the least. Being surrounded by all sorts of lovely people and never quite sure if my constant arrousal was from the right thing I developed symptoms like ADD. It got so that my schoolwork was a serious problem. I was just exhausted by trying to police my own thoughts while hiding my tiny erection.

Anyhow I got shipped off to Randolf Macon Academy, an Air Force prep school. First day of school, long wavy hair chopped off, uniforms that did nothing to support my tits and all I wanted was to find some friends. Fast forward to lunch and I sit down to eat with my tray.

Side note, the food they served was amazing southern banquot style and if I had stayed more than a semester I would be at least 100 lbs heavier. Not entirely a joke, I am getting aroused by the memory of their biscuits and gravy . . . oh and the syrup, I have yet to find its equal. Read more »