[Str8] [MF] The Accidental Orgasm Tourist

Just for fun, here’s a little anecdote I originally shared on Twitter. It’s fun to tell it in a Twitter-style format, so I am reposting it that way. Enjoy.

Marked “Fictional” because technically, I am a ficton, and people get snippy. I didn’t mark it Mdom/Fsub or NC because I didn’t actually DO anything.

Just to set the stage: I am an S-Class Meta specializing in, well, mind control. (Of course it sounds bad when you say it like that.) Since the Legion of Purity has NO sense of humor, *technically* I’m a supervillain.

Original Tweet:

gia· May 16, 2020

fuck sex !! can i lay in bed with you and practice my evil laugh

My reply thread:

This reminds me of a tip that I’d like to share: if you condition your minions to start having quaking orgasms when you do your evil laugh, it will really fuck with the heads of heroes who manage to breach your lair. Their faces, oh my God their faces when they realize.

My minions are only for decoration, recreation, and comic relief, obviously if your minions actually serve functional anti-hero defense purposes you should take that into account.

One time… oh God, you’ll love this, this is great… one time, this rookie hero with a new kind of phase power I hadn’t seen before actually makes it in. She was way more surprised than I was, she couldn’t believe it worked. She just meant to do a little recon…

…but she gets carried away and before she even realizes it, she’s in the control room.

Well, about that time she gets so scared that she drops out of phase. Like, right in front of me!

So we just stare at each other for a second, and then the expression on her face…

… gets to me, and I start laughing. The minions start shaking and moaning and falling to their knees, and the expression she gets from THAT starts making me laugh even harder.

But this is the good bit, you’re never going to believe this next part, I swear to God.

After about thirty seconds – I’m literally leaning on a control panel, I’m laughing so hard I can barely breathe – after about thirty seconds, she gets this bizarre look on her face and starts to breathe really hard. I think she’s trying to phase out so I sort of stumble…

…in her direction so I can grab her, right? Usually they can’t phase if you’re touching them, or else you go with them, so they can’t get away. She’s just a little bit of a thing, I’ve got my defense gear on, it’ll be fine. I really wasn’t going to hurt her, I promise.

But THEN

*pause*

…sorry, perimeter alarm, no big deal.

​

*pause*

Okay, so THEN, she’s looking at me, panting, and all of a sudden her eyes roll up in her head…And she starts coming her BRAINS out.

I mean moaning, shaking, screaming, groping herself like crazy, babbling incoherently, just LOSING IT.

I swear upon my sacred honor or whatever, I did not do ANYTHING to her, AT ALL. She just saw what was happening to the minions and her head did the rest. I was so gobsmacked, I just froze up.

Well, a minute or so after I stop laughing, the minions snap of it, and I just sort of shush them. We all watch. A minute or two after THAT, her brain finally realizes she’s the only one still orgasming and she sputters to a halt.

Oh, Lord, she’s a hot mess.

Hair all messed up. Makeup smeared. Uniform rumpled and torn in a few places. Sweating like a horse. Apparently nobody warned her about putting in a pantyliner when dealing with me so the crotch of her uniform is just SOAKED. She looks like a one-woman sorority Halloween party.

And we’re all just staring at her. She’s looking around, her face is absolutely scarlet, her eyes are like dinner plates, and she’s just working her jaw but nothing is coming out.

Finally, I take a deep breath, get myself in some kind of order, and say, “Can I help you with something, Miss?”

And she says, God love her, she says without missing a beat, “I could use a cigarette.”

So I start laughing.

And the minions start going off again.

And SHE starts going off again.

It took HOURS to get the control room aired out.

Epilogue: I let her have a cigarette, I got her a shower and a change of clothes, and I let her go. Didn’t hurt a hair on her head, didn’t touch a synapse.

Of course, I did point out that the control room has video surveillance.

And meta videos do REALLY well on Pornhub.

Never saw her again. And so far as I know, she never breathed a word to anybody.

You gotta love this business sometimes.

Source: reddit.com/r/sexystories/comments/torom3/str8_mf_the_accidental_orgasm_tourist