I never really the way I looked. I thought that it was just a phase. Everybody had to get used to their grown-up bodies, right? The years went on, but I still felt weird in my own skin. Eventually, I figured out that this weirdness is formally known as “dysphoria”, and that I was a trans man.
That made me feel worse. Now, instead of feeling that my hips were weirdly shaped, I compared my hips to the hips of every man I ever saw. I could never measure up. I would just be this strange, short, deformed guy.
After ranting to one of my friends about how my shoulders were too girly, she suggested, “Try taking naked selfies.”
“Why would I want to do that?” It was such a strange suggestion.
“It helps you get into a headspace of liking your body.”
“But… what if I get hacked?” I’d heard so many warnings about people getting blackmailed.
“Just delete the photos.” She grinned. “They can’t steal photos that don’t exist anymore. Promise me you’ll just take one.”
That night, I took off my clothes and turned on my phone’s camera. Standing in front of my mirror, I felt ungainly. I adjusted my pose before snapping a quick mirror selfie.
The photograph showed the way the light highlighted my body. My hips looked a bit slimmer. My shoulders looked rounded. It even looked like I almost had abs. I mut have spent half an hour looking at every detail of the photograph. After I’d finished looking at it, I deleted it.
Even though I deleted the photo, it stayed in my mind. I wondered if other people had the same experience. I found a small website where other transgender people posted their nudes. Most of the people posting were pre-HRT. They all seemed proud of their bodies. I began to browse it regularly.
I wanted to capture their attitudes. I made an account with the website and started commenting. The community was amazing. Everyone was supportive. Yes, from time to time, there were trolls and detractors, but the moderators shut them down within hours.
One quiet evening, I decided to try putting my own photo online. I moved my furniture and took down a poster so nobody could identify me by the background. Propping my phone against a book, I set the self-timer and took a few photos. My favourite was a one where I was standing tall, with my arms behind my back. If my head wasn’t out of the frame, you could see a confident grin. I scrubbed the metadata from the photos before posting it online.
The reaction was swift. Everybody thought I looked great. People left comments like “handsome man” and “what a fancy guy”. It made me feel amazing.
I might post some photos again. I haven’t told my friend about what the internet thinks of me. It’s my little secret. These photos have made me realise just how attractive I can be, even if I don’t feel like I am.
Source: reddit.com/r/sexystories/comments/ezw1bv/man_youve_gotta_love_yourself_tm_solo