‘Acceptance’

After his divorce, Joe found himself back in the awkward world of online dating. It was strange to be ‘on the market’ again after the long hiatus. The single world changed drastically in his absence. The dramatic shift in frankness made him feel old and out-of-place. He chatted with a number of interesting ladies but there were no meaningful connections; at least not at first. On a number of occasions he was genuinely stunned that some of them revealed highly intimate, sexual preferences almost immediately.

It simply wasn’t anything he expected to learn about anyone he’d just met. Certainly not lurid details like that from prospective lovemaking partners. He barely knew these people! It was startling to witness total strangers being so candid about deeply personal, intimate matters on the very first date. It was a brand new era of full disclosure and direct sexual openness, apparently.

Joe assumed at this later stage in their lives, they were finally comfortable expressing what they truest desired in relationships, and more importantly, in the bedroom. On the surface it made sense. Being fully upfront saved valuable time about relevant things. Regardless, he was still taken aback by their candid forthrightness. One particularly shocking desire kept reoccurring in their unexpurgated conversations.

It seemed like an unusually large number of ladies shared a very specific, surprising kink. At first he didn’t know what to make of it. They were from all walks of life and expressed a strong interest in being choked or ‘throttled’ during sex. He was absolutely dumbfounded and deeply troubled by this reoccurring admission. He didn’t want to ‘kink shame’ anyone but it was just a bridge too far. He couldn’t bring himself to understand.

Just the thought of THAT made him incredibly uncomfortable. He had a healthy interest in sex and a strong libido but his open-mindedness didn’t cross into shadowy, areas of violent force. At least it never had before. Frankly, the idea was unconscionable. He believed violent desires like that were both incredibly rare, and a telling sign of low self-esteem on their part. He assumed it coincided with early childhood abuse. Despite having those initial views, the more women who opened up to him about wanting it, the more it suggested ‘power’ or ‘breath play’ was far more common than he realized. These ladies were outwardly ‘normal’ and denied ever suffering trauma or childhood abuse. It briefly made him want to reconsider his initial opinion about it. He tried not to judge.

There was one amazing lady he really enjoyed spending time with. They connected on multiple levels. She was otherwise fantastic but her dark little confession about the very same thing really bothered him. It was really the only thing about her which troubled him, but it was a BIG thing. It was creepy to the core. They decided to take it slow and get to know each other better before becoming sexually intimate, but he wasn’t sure how he was eventually going to handle ‘that’.

Joe didn’t think he could bring himself to ever do it. It just didn’t compute. As a gentleman, consent and mutual respect were the foundational basis for all of his encounters and actions. Choking a partner for ANY reason felt like a direct violation of that respect. She could see he was incredibly uncomfortable with the idea so she didn’t force it. She hoped he would warm to consensual throttling after the other pieces of their relationship fell into place. Sometimes a person’s hidden desires don’t appear to be logical on the surface. They can even appear quite the opposite but that doesn’t mean they aren’t genuinely beneficial to their happiness, or any less important to them. We want what we want.

Their ‘intimacy waiting period’ served to reinforce a deeper, more personal connection. It fortified their emotional feelings in a three-dimensional way which many modern romances failed to achieve. By the time they allowed themselves to finally go beyond the traditional dating standards of kissing and holding hands, the possibility of going their separate ways was unconscionable. They were connected at the hip. They finished each other’s sentences and all the other lovey-dovey clichés. Joe tried to put his discomfort about her sexual desire to be throttled out of his head.

They were on the sofa together watching an old black and white movie. Joe decided it was finally time to make his move. He leaned over to kiss her with hunger in his eyes. She responded enthusiastically to his wanted advances. The teasing was over at last. Their tongues danced together and sparks flew. She slid sideways until she was lying flat on her back. His body weight pressed down against hers suggestively. He unbuttoned her blouse for the first time. Her erect nipples protruded against the thin bra material and begged to be caressed and suckled. He unfastened the clasp and feasted his eyes on her.

Connie gazed up at him to search his face for a reaction. The approval and lingering animal lust on his face made her flesh tingle in anticipation. He was a hungry man about to feast ON HER. She unfastened the top button on her jeans and deftly shimmied out of them and her panties. Joe removed his shirt, pants and underwear in the same order. Despite their extended period of deep bonding and emotional courtship, it was their first time actually being naked together.

Their fiery kiss continued amid the simultaneous disrobing. His weight bore down on top of her. Her legs instinctually wrapped around him as she waited anxiously to be penetrated. Soon human nature took over and they made passionate love for the very first time. It wasn’t replete with sadomasochistic whips and chains, nor was there choking and ball gags involved. It was pure and simple human intercourse on the most basic level which merged their bodies and minds into one.

As time passed, their relationship grew and progressed. Thankfully so did the complexity and depth of their evolving love for each other. With the genuine bond between them they eventually incorporated advanced sexual techniques and the consensual throttling she craved, on occasion. More importantly came a greater acceptance for who they each were as unique people, and as sexual human beings.

Source: reddit.com/r/Erotica/comments/106msi5/acceptance