M20. Me and my GF are happy in our relationship for 5 years. Over this period of time, we had a rather slow, but steady, evolution regarding our sexual life. We managed to lift our barriers towards one another, we were able to understand what we want and what we like. It was a long journey, having to get rid of our feelings of guilt at first, being raised in a rather strict environment, where sexual stuff was taboo and anyone who openly confessed about doing it and liking it was seen as a lower person.
I had the luck to have open minded parents and of eventually being able to live in another bigger city, with more open minded people that were not complete backstabbers, therefore being able to form actual bonds in time, so this part was hard especially for her, who didn’t change the scenery, choosing to stay in our home town to finish high school. We both live now in a much bigger city, so it’s only better at the moment.
Our sexual experiences are mostly vanilla, with certain exceptions, like some cases of public masturbation, making sure no one notices us. Everything is great, we both enjoy it and managed to get really comfortable and teach one another what we like.
Having said that, I developed a sense of voyeurism since puberty. It is one of my guilty pleasures, I guess. I’m not trying to go out of my way to try staring or peeking on anyone in their vulnerable moments, but rather enjoy if something happen to cross my way. One good example would be my neighbours from the flat in which I was living during high school, who were young and had lots of sex. It was pure bliss being alone in my apartment and being able to hear them clear.
We are both going to Uni and living in student dorms. She has a two-people dorm and is currently staying with one of her colleagues (F), with whom she developed a great friendship. Thing is, that colleague is really active, sexually speaking, so she often heard her masturbating at night, as she thought that my GF was sleeping. She never tried to talk to her about this, because she didn’t see anything wrong with it. Sometimes, after a while, she would also be doing it at the same time with her if she also felt horny, however, keeping herself as silent as possible in order to not be spotted.
At some point during these years, I happened to remain at their dorms for the night, where I too was able to hear her colleague. Being the voyeur that I am, it really stuck to my mind.
After a period of time I confronted my GF about it and explained it to her that I heard her, I was positively affected by it, but, rather than feeling sexual desires towards her roommate, I mostly felt this energy towards her (GF). To be honest, every kind of situation like this makes me feel more active towards my GF and feeling the need to place her at the center of the scenery, watching her get a good experience while helping. It is my fantasy, I guess. So, the discussion ended up in a mutual masturbation in which we imagined her and her roommate getting off while watching one another. It was a wild experience, she enjoyed it at the moment, felt some sense of guilt towards her friend after that but eventually got rid of it, as she understood that fantasies are fantasies, she isn’t guilty of anything shameful and the experience was worth it, so, in short, a great act. Sadly, we never got to repeat it.
Lately, I felt the need to talk to her about it again. I would like to be able to get her to experience this voyeuristic side such as the one I possess as well, to make her lose some more of her possible barriers in order to discover more broaden fantasies and overall get to both enjoy sexual enjoys from the outside together. She didn’t really try any of these things that often, this sense of guilt, shame and “sluttiness” (in a bad way) that was forced upon us in the early life being one important reason for keeping things vanilla.
Of course, I don’t want to be pushy about it and I don’t want her to feel forced or obliged to try it. I want her to be able to experience this without feeling like a lower person for it. In our latest discussion about this she seemed to be 100% trustful, happy to hear that all of my energy is channeled towards her and curious about this side of things.
The comment section and my DMs remain open for discussion. I welcome every opinion and would gladly chat about it, even if it’s just to share experiences,
PS: She doesn’t regret said experience, she even remembers it as a really great memory of us.
Source: reddit.com/r/Erotica/comments/xnlj3r/m20_and_f20_trying_to_broaden_our_sexual