# Part of an ongoing series for beginners on a path to dominance or anyone who loves great erotic stories and pictures.
I was hooked. My years of searching, banging my head against the wall looking for a source of submissive women, were finally redeemed. The website that ended my drought, that allowed me to become the true Dominant I have become was Seeking Arrangements (SA).
Like most pages I could only see profiles, but couldn’t message without a paid subscription. I toyed with it for a while to see if I wanted to breach the paywall. I had already wasted hundreds of dollars on other websites like Alt.com, Adultfriendfrinder.com, BDSM.com and a host of others. To say I was reluctant was an understatement. I left various likes to some of the profiles, most of which were women under 35 looking for an older more mature man. I was cautiously hopeful.
Once I had convinced myself it was worth the risk of $60/month I took the plunge. I will never forget the shock I received the next day when not only did I receive answers to the messages I sent, I had unsolicited messages from women who had reached out to me. What? This was nothing like my experiences on every other page. But let’s see how these girls play out.
It wasn’t long before I had already booked my first few dates all of which were with women in their 20s. This would prove to be both a blessing and a curse as I would soon enough find out. But for now I was excited as hell.
I won’t bore you with each date, but let’s just say it was dating like I had never experienced before. There were a couple ladies that were particularly interesting right away. One of the first ladies I met was Oli. My experience with this woman would help shape how I screened the ladies in the future. Oli was blonde, busty and very promiscuous when she had a drink. After dinner and a few drinks, Oli was particularly tipsy. She kept spreading her legs so I could see her panty-less shaved pussy. Before I knew it she was riding my leg telling me she wanted to take me home.
I didn’t take her home that night but rather arranged for an evening in a hotel with the meagre beginnings of my toy collection. The meeting in the hotel was like a feast for a starving man. Not only did she look sexy as hell, she was totally up for a sexual adventure. I only had a few toys to play with including a feather-duster-like whip that couldn’t mark an infant’s bottom let alone a grown woman’s. Some basic leather cuffs that my first Mentor Rigger John gave me in our first Shibari rope instruction session with my then girlfriend Samantha. The one item of my paltry toy collection that I was most eager to use was the leg spreader that I had recently bought.
There is always that first mass purchase of Kinky gear. The purchase that follows after the honeymoon period of shock and awe fade and the desire to really get stuck in warrants you have EVERYTHING. And the spreader bar was part of this purchase. A new toy for a new toy. I was going to have some fun.
What a hot session with a hot girl it was. Oli’s breasts were luscious, ample D-cups that looked even larger on her petite 5’3” frame. Her hair was silver blond the color of Daenerys Targaryen in Game of Thrones and fell down to her mid back. She was vocal as well, to the point I wondered if we might get a call from the front desk. It began with me commanding her about. Tame really looking back on it, but I was just bumbling around really. I commanded her to drop to her knees and suck my cock, which she did with great enthusiasm. The bottle of wine started to seep into her veins, subtly liberating her libido from her cautious reservations. Less of a bondage-heavy D/s play time and more a savage fucking session with me totally empowered by my newfound outlet for my Dominant desires. To Oli, also a newbie to BDSM, it all seemed like it was supposed to. That was good. I had successfully navigated my first D/s encounter generically sourced from SA. Most importantly it was authentic and fun.
Oli was fun and raunchy, but a bit out of control emotionally and drank too much. If I could get her before she was annihilated, she was fun, but other times it was just drama. I would later hear from her that she was diagnosed as Bi-polar. That would explain things. At this stage I was not too affected by her drama as we were not an item. I would see Oli for a couple months before it was just too much like being a college student again and we agreed to amicably end it. Luckily, I was also seeing a number of other stunning women during my exploration so my self-education continued.
Patti-June was another of the women I was seeing. She was very different to Oli, Patti was tall 5′ 7″ and clearly a submissive woman if I had ever met one. She had a lithe if slightly awkward physique that she covered up by a grunge-like dress style. In London she was considered a Hipster. Once I could get her out of her London, winter clothing, she had surprisingly ample B-cup breasts that she worked hard to conceal. But when I did reveal them it was a very pleasant surprise. Her auburn-tinted long hair cascaded over the pale white breasts, small nipples poking through her ever waving hair. She was irresistible and I drank her in and enjoyed this awkward, vulnerable, beautiful woman’s body like only an older appreciative man could. My praises to her beauty were frequent, but she was not used to hearing such things. Patti didn’t see herself like that.
Both women had such different personalities. It was keeping me on my toes. But I was loving it. The first week we met each other I invited Patti on a trip with me to Bruneck, Italy where she was to keep me company during my week visit. Bruneck around Christmas time, this being mid-December, was magical. It sits in the Italian Alps with some of the most breathtaking views I have ever seen. This was a crazy whirlwind kind of adventure I had never taken before, but it was proving fun. Each day I gave her tasks to do while I was working and instructed her what to wear to the events we attended in the evenings. She proved to be an excellent sub even if it was less formal and more like a Sugar Daddy/baby arrangement. Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t paying her to be with me, but I was treating her.
In hindsight it was a train wreck waiting to happen, but I continued with this woman for a number of months after the trip. We even went to Florence during Easter. Patti was easy going and did exactly what I told her to. Our fling consisted a lot of her serving me in many ways including sexual. Although she had a sexy fit body, she was deeply insecure and shy. Enjoying her body sexually was one thing, but pushing a D/s dynamic on her was going to be tough. But Patti did trigger something inside me though; a kind of Fatherly supportive, nurturing feeling that wanted me to help Patti see what she was worth. I cared for her in ways I didn’t feel for Oli. It wasn’t love as I didn’t feel attached to her like that. I felt more like a mentor. I would later connect this to being feelings of a Daddy Dom.
As I mentioned, Patti was a bit unbalanced. Not only was she going through a separation and divorce, but she was going out regularly and staying out all night. Sometimes when we met she had literally not slept the night before. So although we had some amazing experiences together, eventually, Patti would drift away mainly due to the acrimony over her divorce and her need to move out of her home. In hindsight, Patti was a mess and this lifestyle was not right for her at this time of her life. This was one of the lessons I learned during this relationship. A D/s dynamic requires mental commitment. For those with the wrong mindset, a D/s dynamic can be too much to handle.
My conquests carried on over the course of a year. Some subs would stick around for a couple months, some longer. Yet, I struggled with finding what I was looking for despite having a literal smorgasbord of available willing, submissive pussy.
What was happening? Maybe I should take a break? These questions continued to pop up. So, I slowed down my searches. I cancelled my membership to SA for a month or so until the time when the current submissive in training was boring me. Then all it took was a click of a button and a couple likes and I was back in business again. I would sometimes go a month without meeting someone, but I was in London. There was a constant flow of new women all the time, so it was just a matter of time.
**Manifesting What I Want**
Overall Seeking Arrangement had been a gold mine for me. I have been genuinely pleased with the quality of connections I was making and meeting. However, there was something missing. Many of these girls were in it just for the money, to pay bills, or to find their rich sugar Daddy to sweep them off their feet. A representative response like the one below was a common message.
“As long as you pay me, honey, I will do whatever you want me to do.”
I had tried that already with Amy (see Post and it left me wanting more). Needless to say those girls were given the boot.
It took some time and repeated recrafting of my profile to finally find the happy medium. I tried direct. “Dominant Man seeking a submissive woman to serve me…blah blah blah,” you get the message. This approach brought scolding from some women, challenges with moderators, and not great response.
Alternatively, I tried to keep it more vanilla. That seem to bring in the more LTR or marriage minded women. I would find in the future that these women were the ones most intimidated by my Questionnaire. Nice, sweet and often gorgeous women but again not suited to the D/s lifestyle, at least not yet.
What ended up working best for me was a profile that was subtle yet inferring meaning. A statement like, Dominant man seeks match as my header sent a very clear message.
One of the things I have learned in my life is the power of visualization and manifestation. I had manifested all that has come to me thus far and this would be no different. I knew I had to be more specific about what I wanted. Up to this point I had not specified more than just a “submissive nubile woman” for what I desired. It was time I got more specific.
One thing that had really resonated with me was that although women in the 20’s are lots of fun, with that fun comes inevitable drama as they seek to find themselves and what they want and desire. I don’t fault them at all. I hope I have helped each of these nubile ladies to feel free to express their inner desires and sexual appetites. But there was something they didn’t have and that was self-knowledge that can only come with living life. This realization led me to seek more mature women, women clearer about their own identity and what they want from life. And so, my search criteria began to change.
One of the means I took to filter out what I didn’t want was to compile a sub/slave questionnaire. The same document I compiled then, I continue to use today to weed out the amusement ride seekers, money chasers and the fantasists. Surprisingly, it wasn’t even the results of the Questionnaire that I found most revealing of their nature. Rather it was how they dealt with the Questionnaire: how long they took to complete it, how thoroughly they completed it, the negotiation around what they would complete.
It was almost comedy at times. For many, it was a real struggle whether they should complete the document or not. I never once told them that it was required, but most assumed it was and so would remove themselves from consideration if they weren’t comfortable completing it. One woman refused to use my format and sent it to me in text messages instead. I even had two ladies contact me months later to ask if it was still OK to complete the questionnaire. Although the results of the questionnaire were of course erotic and insightful, the real insight I gleaned was in each woman’s internal struggle with whether to complete the document. It was in this struggle that I gained insight into the authentic submissive mind.
Over the course of a year my filtering progressively got better. Although I had fewer dates, I was meeting much more suitable women who were eager to embark on this D/s journey. I was now feeling much more confident in my role as a Dominant. I was learning how my submissives responded to commands, how they dealt with rejection. I was learning how it all made me feel. As I vowed to myself that this is all for fun. The moment it stops being fun is when I stop. The only way to do that is to continue pushing boundaries and ask for and do the things I want to without judgment of myself or others. The next phase of my evolution as A Dominant would continue with enthusiasm.
Master “Daddy” Linton
Source: reddit.com/r/sexystories/comments/kjmjbq/finding_your_own_submissive_woman_dom_dom_dom