An Ode to Uncertainty – Chapter 6-7 [MF][MFF][Fantasy]

Please read chapters 1 – 5 first if you have not done so. This is not a stand-alone story. Link to other chapters in comments.

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Part 2 – Sigrid

Six

Sigrid left the argument behind her. As soon as it was declared that she was not needed until morning she had left them behind. The voices penetrated through the thick oaken door and it was clear that Jarl was losing.

*Not my problem*, Sigrid thought and headed out of the building.

The large bell tower had just struck noon and the campus was filled with students about to embark on wherever their Cleansingday plans were bringing them. Sigrid knew where she was going on her unexpected day off. She headed down the hill on the small avenue that led to all the strange bookshops. Last time they passed she had been certain that one of the books looked at her. She stopped for a second and inspected the ground where Jarl stopped every time they passed. She could see nothing different about it. The path was regular square flagstones of some rough variety. Grass covered both sides of the path and a few old trees stood crooked, almost leaning away from the College.

*Seems like I’m not the only one that wants to get out of this place whenever I can.*

A couple of students that were heading her way, one of them looked familiar. Oh. The Idiot and his friends. He caught her looking at him and she quickly ducked away and headed down the avenue.

“Hey! You!” someone shouted behind her.

She had no interest in talking to any of them. She sprinted down the path and turned a sharp left after the first building of the regular houses, the one with the bookstore that only kept books that looked like animals. She climbed up one of the walls, as she reached the top she looked back and saw the Idiot and his posse looking up at her in awe. She shrugged down at them and continued over the rooftops. She had heard some of the others using it at night calling it the *high way*. It made sense. There were places where planks or ropes had been put up so that you could cross over where it was too far to jump, at least for the people normally using them. Sigrid sprinted over one roof and leapt, soaring through the air and landing lightly on the next continuing like that to the park that separated College from Parchent. Once there she scaled down the façade of the building and leapt onto the railing of one of the bridges that crossed the small river separating the districts. As she reached the other side, she went up again.

Walking with Jarl it had taken almost half a bell to get to Sinner’s Delight, sprinting the high way it took less than ten drops. Sigrid slipped down onto the window ledge and peeked through the window. She was in her bed. Sigrid silently opened the window and stepped inside. She walked over to the bed and stood next to it looking down at the sleeping figure. Irese’s long blonde hair flowed down her back, the cover had slipped down and Sigrid could see the top of her buttocks. Sigrid stood watching the sleeping woman for a few drops. Sigrid quickly reached out for her watchers, all seemed clear, Jarl was in no immediate danger. She looked back at Irese.

“Are you just going to stand there, or will you get in here with me”, Irese said in her drawly Imperial looking over her shoulder.

Sigrid smiled and started shedding her clothes. She had spent the first three nights after arriving at Eldor perched outside of Irese’s window. Watching. Waiting. Watching her service her clients. Waiting for Irese to notice her. But of course, she hadn’t. On the fourth night as Irese shepherded her last client out of her room Sigrid cracked the window open and slid in. She stood behind one of the large tapestries for another hour until Irese was asleep. The tapestries were hanging unconventionally far from the wall, almost as if it was intended for spying. Then she had stepped out and stalked over to the bed looking down at Irese, who looked back up at her with a smirk on her face.

“I wondered how many nights it would take before you dared come in,” Irese had said with that wonderful voice of hers.

Sigrid undid her belts and hung them over the back of a chair. Quickly counted that all ten throwing daggers were there. One for each Sister in her pride. The needle-like longdagger that sat tight against the outside of her thigh went next and the slender sheath soon hung next to the belt. Last came the striking daggers that lay slick against the insides of her wrists in their spring-loaded sheaths. She undid the rest of her clothes and slid under the sheet behind Irese. The woman purred as Sigrid put her arms around her letting a hand rest over one of Irese’s large breasts. A small shiver went through Sigrid as she felt the other woman’s nipple stiffen slightly as her palm brushed over it. But right now, she just wanted to sleep. She put her nose in Irese’s hair and drew deep on her scent and quickly fell asleep.

“What’s this one?” Irese said trailing a long-nailed finger along one of the scars that went parallel to one of Sigrid’s ribs.

“Assault on the High King of Ostheim’s summer palace.”

“You were trying to kill a king?” Irese said incredulously.

“Not trying. Succeeding.”

Irese furrowed her brows as if trying to read Sigrid’s mind. Sigrid just looked at her until Irese gave up and shook her head smiling at her.

“Who gave it to you?”

“One of the king’s personal guard. I was young and eager. And not very smart. I missed him as I stepped into the king’s chamber and he put a spear through my chest, right here,” Sigrid said taking Irese’s hand and pushing it against the scar.

Then she took the hand and moved it up to her breast. Irese smiled, leaned in and kissed her and caressed her breast with her hand. Sigrid’s chest was almost like a boy’s but Irese did not seem to care, she treated Sigrid’s breasts as if they had been as large as her own. Sigrid let herself get lost in Irese’s soft lips and the touch of her hand for a while as the outside world disappeared. She had not had anyone like Irese since Torun, and that was five years ago. The blond woman’s lips started exploring her body, stopping a short while whenever she encountered a new scar, and there were plenty of those. Finally, she arrived at Sigrid’s wetness. Sigrid gasped and put her head back as Irese put her long tongue into her heat. She lay there focusing on nothing but what Irese was doing to her. Closer and closer to the edge. She crumpled the sheet in her hands and arched up towards Irese’s mouth and her whole body shook as she reached her peak. She fell down on the bed completely exhausted. Irese purred again as she crawled up next to her and put her head on Sigrid’s shoulder. They lay there for a while just listening to the each other breathe.

“Did you like holding me?” Irese said with her mouth close to Sigrid’s neck, her breath hot on Sigrid’s skin.

Sigrid looked down at the other woman.

“What do you mean?”

Irese looked up at her.

“You know what I mean.”

She did. And she had enjoyed it a lot. Holding Irese’s head in a tight grip as Jarl thrust into her mouth, leaving Irese completely defenseless. It had been … exhilarating. Part of her had wished to hold Irese down harder, to force her to her will, another part of her … she was almost ashamed of the thought, another part of her wanted to be Irese.

“You did like it,” Irese said with more than a hint of satisfaction in her voice.

Sigrid blushed. Sigrid *never* blushed, she could not remember herself blushing, ever. She blushed even harder at the thought of herself blushing. Irese put her lips at Sigrid’s ear and whispered.

“Next time I want you to hold me even harder. And I want you to pinch my nipples until I squirm.”

Sigrid felt a heat rising inside her at Irese’s words. She dared not look the other woman in the eyes. Instead she looked at the blonde woman’s slowly heaving breasts and got even wetter.

“My turn,” she said and slid down along Irese’s body.

She stopped briefly at her breasts, she never could get quite enough of them, and then continued down to her cleft. She spent almost half a bell pleasing Irese before she reached her peak.

“What do you think of Jarl?” Irese asked as they lay panting next to each other.

Sigrid looked over at Irese. The blonde woman was looking up at the ceiling twirling her hair with one hand.

“He’s a buffoon. A fool.”

Irese looked over at her raising an eyebrow.

“Aren’t you supposed to be protecting his life?”

Sigrid nodded.

“I’ve protected fools in the past, it is usually a lot harder than protecting regular people. The only ones harder to protect than fools are intelligent people. And I fear that Jarl may be an intelligent fool.”

She did not know where all the words came from. She usually did not say more than a single sentence and normally they were quite short. Irese was nodding at her. Sigrid tried reading the expression on her companion’s face but couldn’t. Sometimes she really wondered what Irese was thinking.

“Does he know that you speak Imperial?”

Sigrid shrugged. She didn’t know. She didn’t care.

“I don’t think so. And I’m not going to tell him. I told you. He’s a fool.”

“He’s a darn attractive fool though,” Irese said and with a smile she added. “And he has such a wonderful cock.”

Sigrid tried her best not to blush again and almost succeeded.

“Do you like cock?” Irese asked as if it was the most normal subject two people could talk about.

Sigrid blushed harder. Irese rolled over on her side and smiled wider.

“You do. You love cock, don’t you?” she said her eyes sparkling.

Sigrid looked away. She had not been with a man in years, but Irese’s words brought the memories back. Irese was right. Sigrid did love cock. The only problem was that she hated men.

​

Sigrid left the Sinner’s Delight at eight bells, just before Irese’s first client would arrive. She had checked in on her watchers again and there was still nothing out of the regular. She was painfully aware that if one of them did go off she was likely too far away to do anything about it. She was walking the brightly lit roads but increased her pace a little, skipping every third step. She wondered if the Sisters had anyone spying on her, they were awfully far from the Citadel of Daggers, but she wouldn’t put it beneath them. Given the amount of money that the Nordheimrs were paying for her services there may very well be someone looking out for their investment. But on the other hand, she was an exile. There was no other word for the mission they had given her. Putting her three thousand miles away from the Citadel was exile. Even if it paid well.

She started passing more and more inebriated students from the College the closer she got. Heading up the walkway towards Jarl’s quarters she once again saw the Idiot and his gang. They were sitting near one of the large oaks sharing a bottle of wine, she was tempted to go closer to eavesdrop but made her way into the building instead. Outside of Jarl’s door she stopped to listen. Nothing. She put her ear against the door. The wood was unnaturally smooth. She thought she heard light snoring. It wasn’t even nine bells yet. Well, she wasn’t going in there voluntarily and she had been dismissed until morning. After a moments reflection she headed up the stairs that led to the roof. She had already cracked the lock once and it didn’t take three blinks to get it open this time. She went out into the night and propped herself up on one of the gargoyles that hung over the edge of the building. To the casual observer she probably looked like another one of the beasts.

***

It was past three bells and the last stragglers had made their way home when movement caught her eye. Someone, or something was moving down by the Animancy building. Sigrid stood up and walked quietly along the ridge of the roof. Four quick steps and a leap later she landed on the College Library roof. Heading along the ridge she walked over to the edge that faced the Animancy building. One of the large doors was open and she could see light from inside. She ducked down as someone looked out of the doorway. Was that Master Olgric? It was difficult to see at this distance. Whoever it was waved his hand and from the other side of the plaza a group of men carrying a large box started moving. It seemed to be heavy work and at least once one of the men almost tripped bringing the whole company to the ground but caught his footing it at the last instance. In short order five more boxes, of varying size, but all were heavy, were moved into the Animancy building after which the doors were closed and audibly locked. Sigrid sat there for a few more drops before heading back to the dormitory.

As the towers started chiming the sixth bell Sigrid went down into the building and headed towards Jarl’s door. She looked at the other doors she passed. When she thought of it, she hadn’t seen anyone else use one of them, ever. No one else even seemed to enter the building. Cloud it be that they were the only ones there? She arrived at Jarl’s door. Felt the handle. It was unlocked. As quietly as she could she lowered the handle and opened the door.

“Sigrid! Where have you been!”

Jarl almost shouted the words as she stepped through the door.

*Awake? At six in the morning? On Saviorday?* Sigrid thought as she looked at Jarl’s haggard face. She opened her mouth to answer but he beat her to it.

“You cannot believe what has occurred. A most heinous crime. As awful as the damning of the seventh. The most horrible thing that could ever happen to me,” he said waiving a few papers in front of her face. “I’m doomed!”

He handed her the papers and threw his hands into the air.

“I never knew how much Jorgrim hated me until this very moment,” he said falling into one of the soft sofas that he liked so much.

Sigrid looked down at the papers. They were hand-written letters.

“Doomed,” Jarl said putting his face in his hands.

Sigrid looked at him. She knew that Jorgrim was his eldest, still living, brother, the one in line for the throne. He was some eighty years old. The king of Nordheim had been siring heirs for a long, long time. She looked down at the topmost letter.

*Dear brother,*

*It is with deepest regret that We must inform you that Our beloved father has joined our ancestors in the Golden Halls. As this letter reaches you, his ashes will already have been scattered over the Wild Sea and his spirit will have departed this world.*

*It was his final dying wish that We care for his wife, the queen dowager, and that We give her a husband and a home.*

*In my grace as the new ruler and High King of Nordheim it is Our pleasure to inform you that We have chosen you, my dear brother, to take the hand of the queen dowager in marriage, until the day that one of you leaves for the Golden Halls.*

*We will be sending the queen dowager, her servants as well as a cleric of the True Faith with this letter so that the marriage can be officiated with utmost haste. We do not wish to see the queen dowager unwed for too long lest We fail in our duties to Our beloved, departed father.*

*My best wishes in your endeavors,*

*Your beloved brother,*

*Jorgrim the Magnificent, High King of Nordheim*

Sigrid lowered the letter and looked over at Jarl. The young man was laying on his back in one of the sofas and seemed to be crying. She couldn’t blame him. Everything she knew about the former queen told her that she was a despicable human being and would, very likely, kill Jarl if he did something that displeased her.

*Well, that is the one thing I cannot let her do. Not on my watch.*

Sigrid let out a sigh. She scanned the rest of the papers. One was a letter from Jarl’s father that must have been written just before the man died and another one from one of Jarl’s other brothers. She put the papers down on the table.

“When is the wedding?” she said crossing her arms over her chest.

Jarl stopped sobbing and looked up at her.

“What?” he said sitting up. “Is that all you can say? When is the wedding? I’ll tell you when the wedding is,” he said thrusting his left arm out.

She saw the traditional Nordheimr wedding bracelet around his wrist. It looked heavy and if she was not mistaken it was made of solid gold.

*As if there weren’t enough reasons someone would want to kill him, now they put a gleaming bounty on his wrist*, Sigrid thought shaking her head. *That thing must be worth a fortune.*

Jarl let out a long sigh and fell back on the sofa again.

“Will the queen dowager be staying here?” Sigrid said fearing the worst.

Protecting one ignorant fool was hard enough without that horrid woman kicking her out for fifteen bells.

“Oh, gods I hope not. That would be completely horrible,” Jarl said putting his hands on top of his head. “She said she was going out to find a place. And it’s princess Else now, or for you it’s ‘*your grace*’. If you call her that other thing, she will likely tear your head off. With her gleaming white teeth.”

*Well. She can try*, Sigrid thought fingering her throwing knives set inside her thick belt.

Jarl stared at her for a blink.

“You don’t think she expects me to live with her, do you?”

*Isn’t that what married people do?*

She shrugged. As far as she knew there were no rules that students had to stay on campus. Mirja had said that many of the higher year students lived outside of campus, even if it was most often close by.

“The seventh be damned, what am I to do?”

“You are going to go to class tomorrow. Do not do anything rash,” Sigrid said walking over to the window.

She could almost feel Jarl’s glare at her back.

*Not my problem. As long as you continue your studies.*

​

Seven

There was no news from princess Else during Saviorday. Jarl refused to go out. He spent all his time sulking in bed. Sigrid brought him some food and drink, of which he ate or drank nothing. Mirja came calling on Saviorday evening but Jarl just chased her away. Sigrid shrugged when the Kelivese woman asked what was wrong. She was not going to tell her, the fool had to do it himself. Mirja left and Jarl finally went to sleep. Sigrid paid a quick visit to Irese early Moonday morning and got back to the prince’s quarters just before the towers struck five bells. She kicked Jarl out of bed at seven. It was more difficult than usual, no surprise there.

She stood by the door to the lecture halls all day. As she considered it a safe place, she always took the opportunity to put herself into a resting trance. That way she did not have sleep at night. Most assassination attempts happened after dark. Naturally. Only once had she protected a mark that was assaulted in daylight. And that was a crazy person. You could never be certain, there could be a crazy person here in the lecture hall. Come to think of it, there probably was. But none that were likely to kill Jarl. At least not in front of the Master.

During Geomancy she made sure that she had a clear view over the Idiot and his gang. If there was one person that would consider hurting the prince, it was probably him. But the dark-haired man seemed oblivious to Jarl keeping all his focus on Master Cerdic.

“I’m going back to my room,” Jarl said as the last class was over.

“No, you’re not,” she said without looking at him.

“What now,” Jarl said despondently.

Sigrid saw the Idiot heading their way and kept a close look on him as he passed three steps behind Jarl. But he was deep in conversation with his friends. One of them took notice of Sigrid though. Sigrid glared at her until the girl lowered her gaze.

“You have an appointment with Mistresses Lorelee and Varja at four bells, remember?”

She could not quite read Jarl’s expression. Part of him seemed to want to crawl out of his skin while the other part put a grin on his face.

“Right,” he said, and they headed over to the Matrimancy building.

As last time Sigrid was made to stand outside the door. There were … noises. Sigrid put herself in a trance to block them out. If the two Mistresses killed him … well, there was nothing she could do about that. It only took four bells this time until the door opened, and Jarl staggered out. Sigrid caught his arm led him down the hall.

“Those women …” Jarl said shaking his head.

Sigrid looked over at him. He looked more exhausted than last time he had visited but he didn’t have the same mania in his eyes and there was still that stupid grin on his face. Probably a good sign.

“I think I need some sleep.”

Sigrid agreed and almost had to carry him to his quarters and put him to bed. The following two days passed without incidents. Jarl attended his classes and there was still no word from the princess, which put Jarl in a significantly better mood.

That all changed the third day of Springdawn. What they here down in the south called Seigfridsmonth. Jarl was sitting at his table studying. She had only had to threaten him twice the last four bells, which was not too bad given his tendency to defocus. He was a horrible student.

“Beloved husband!” came the princess’ shrill voice as the door was almost run off its hinges.

Sigrid spun around and reached for a dagger but put it back as she saw the princess and her entourage entering the room. Jarl’s face fell at the sight of the princess. She had apparently been shopping. She was wearing one of the strange southlander dresses with huge puffs on her arms, long skirt and a corset that pushed her already ample bosom up to unexpected new heights.

“I have found the most marvelous house for us down on the East Side.”

Princess Else’s smile was as wide as the outstretched wings of a snow falcon. She walked over to Jarl and gave him a sloppy kiss on his passive lips.

“East Side?” he croaked.

“Of Palace Hill you silly thing,” the princess said taking her gloves off and throwing them on a chair. “It is *the* place to be. And it was only two thousand talents. An absolute bargain.”

Sigrid had to control herself not to show any emotions. Two *thousand* talents. She had never in her life heard of that much money. That would be two *million* gold. The Nordheimr’s were paying *one* talent a year for her services. And she had thought that was steep.

“I’ve already put the money up for the down payment. We’re moving in as soon as you go to the bank and arrange the papers.”

Jarl’s face fell even further.

“No sour face,” princess Else said turning his chair around and straddling him planting another kiss on his lips. “Leave us,” the princess said as she put a hand down the front of Jarl’s pants.

Her entourage quickly filed out of the room. Sigrid stood still watching as the princess coaxed Jarl’s stiff member out. His body was clearly betraying him once again, given the look on his face.

“What are you still doing here?” the princess said with a scowl on her face as she noticed Sigrid.

Sigrid did not move.

“Tell her to leave. And not to come back until morning.”

“Do as she says,” Jarl said looking at Sigrid.

Sigrid nodded and left.

​

Jarl moved out two days later. He still used the room in the dormitory as a study. The princess insisted that Jarl would be perfectly safe when he was with her and that Sigrid could pick him up every morning at their mansion and leave him at the gates in the evening. Jarl confirmed the princess’ orders.

*Not my problem*, Sigrid thought. *Contract says that I do as he says. And what could possibly happen when he is inside the mansion?*

A lot of things could happen it turned out. The mansion was a huge building next to the river on the East Side of Palace Hill. Sigrid easily broke into it three times without the incompetent guards that the princess had hired even noticing. If anyone decided to send an even passably competent assassin, the prince would be as dead as the Northlands. She found an unused room in one of the towers where she had a good view of the garden. She boarded up the door from the inside, there was an easy path in via two wide ledges up to a narrow window. She scavenged a few blankets and mats from another room, there were so many in there she couldn’t see how anyone could possibly notice. She put up another ten watchers in and around the mansion. It took her three nights to complete everything without the guards noticing. During the days she accompanied Jarl to the College.

The princess had forbidden him to walk and had bought him a horrendous horse drawn carriage that resembled a pearly white egg. They stood out like a boil on a young bride’s face. Sigrid sighed. At least the ride from the East Side to the College only went through the best quarters of town, no, or at least very small, risk of daylight robbery there. It was a one hour ride every way. Luckily the Masters and Mistresses were not early risers so they did not have to leave the mansion until nine in the mornings and got back just before dark.

The days became weeks and soon two months had passed. Jarl had spent close to ten sessions with the Matrimancy Mistresses and, to Sigrid’s complete surprise, passed all of his exams in Elemancy. If she was not mistaken, he was starting to hate studying a little less. It could be that he was allowed to study in his rooms at the university and did not have to go back to the mansion until nine bells.

It was the last week of Midsummer, or as the southlanders called it, Yonaksmonth. Horrible name. If she remembered correctly it was some southlander god or other. Maybe the god of light. She couldn’t be bothered to learn all the stupid things that the southlanders came up with. The gods of the True Faith were far away and when she prayed, she could almost feel something else accosting her, trying to curry her favor.

The flowers were all in full bloom and the normal odor of the city, garbage, people and animals was slightly alleviated by the scent of the flowers. It was the first time in months that she could take full breaths without feeling nauseous. Jarl was at a full night session with the Mistresses, it was the second such session and apparently included no less than eight other students as well. As the session wouldn’t end until eight bells in the morning Sigrid took the opportunity to go visit Irese. It was ten bells on Triday evening, and the streets were busy. She looked down on the people below as she headed along the high way. Just as she passed into Parchent she recognized someone. Master Cerdic. The heavyset man was heading up the street and kept looking back. Sigrid caught up with him and studied him almost directly from above. He looked calm but determined. What was he doing in Parchent? She didn’t think the Master ever left the College, he seemed like as much as an inventory as the old benches in the lecture halls. As he turned the corner and headed up towards where the Sinner’s Delight was located Sigrid got that tingle in her earlobes that she always got when something was not right. He stopped shortly in front of the door to Sinner’s Delight. He looked around. Sigrid dove down and hugged the roof as his gaze turned upwards. After a few blinks she looked over the edge. He was gone. She lay there breathing for a drop before standing up and heading over to the other side of the park where she had scoped out a place that had a good view to the Parlor. She brought out her small looking glass and put it to one eye. Something in her made her wait until last before she looked at Irese’s window. And there he was. She moved a few paces to the right to get a better view. They were standing two paces apart and seemed to be talking. She could only see the side of their faces. It was impossible to read their lips and even though the window was open to let in some air she could not hear a word. She cursed herself for not putting a watcher at Irese’s. She had used the last ones in the master bedroom in the mansion. After a while Irese took her clothes off and the Master did the same. Could it just be that he was a client? A coincidence?

Irese got down on her knees in front of the Master and started pleasuring him. Sigrid exhaled. He was only a client. Normally Sigrid liked to watch Irese with her clients. She would sit out on the ledge during the small hours until Irese was done. But she didn’t want to watch Master Cerdic. She headed down to a small pub she had frequented a few times before and slowly drank two mugs of the local ale, listening to the gossip. At two bells in the morning she headed back to the Parlor getting up on the ledge outside Irese’s window. Irese usually ended at three bells but as she got back Irese wasn’t there. Strange. She waited another hour. Just as she was about to leave the door to Irese’s room opened and her friend entered.

“Where have you been?” Sigrid asked as she stepped in through the window.

Irese startled and dropped what she was carrying. A book fell to the floor and a few pages fell out.

“Don’t do that! You let me know before you come in,” she said in an irritated voice and got onto her knees to collect her things.

Funny. Sigrid had not considered Irese to be a reading person.

“Sorry,” Sigrid said hurrying over to the help.

“I’m fine. I got it,” Irese said pushing her away.

She collected the last of the papers and stood up holding them tight to her chest.

“I’m sorry,” Irese said smiling at her. “You just surprised me, that’s all. It’s been a long night.”

Sigrid smiled back. Irese put the book and the papers into the top drawer of one of the chiffoniers that stood against the walls, the one with the small mirror on top. Sigrid looked at her own reflection. She looked so … stern. She tried smiling. It made her look like an evil imp. She went back to stern before Irese turned around.

“How long has Master Cerdic been a client?”

Irese blinked a few times before answering. She was almost certain that she saw surprise in the blonde woman’s face.

“Who?”

And then her face went blank. Sigrid just couldn’t figure her out.

“The very large fellow from earlier this evening.”

Irese blinked a few times more.

“Ah. You mean Mr. Brecht.”

“Brecht?”

“That’s what he calls himself,” Irese said walking towards the bed shedding her dress on the way.

She was naked underneath and Sigrid drew a sharp breath as Irese turned around and smiled wickedly at her.

“I’m not surprised though. Most people give an alias when they come see me. Not all, but most.”

Sigrid nodded. She thought it was strange though. Why would a man like Master Cerdic not go to one of the College run Parlors and come here? But as Irese smiled at her and beckoned with her finger, she acknowledged that any man that had met Irese probably would want to come back.

“Are you coming?” Irese said and crawled into bed.

Another week passed. The summer break was coming up. Sigrid still couldn’t believe that the whole College went off for four weeks of … doing nothing. She would go completely crazy if she had to do nothing for a whole month. Luckily watching over Jarl did not take a break.

It was getting hotter than Sigrid ever thought was possible, and then Mirja claimed that even further south it was warm enough that the trees couldn’t grow. That there were places where everything was sand. It sounded like a horrible place. Mirja had started coming over to study, and sleep with, Jarl during the days. Apparently, he had real talent for Elemancy, so much that even the brilliant Mirja wanted his tutelage.

At least once per study session they took a break and lay with each other. Jarl made her hold Mirja down as he used the dark-haired girl. Sigrid had started holding Mirja harder and every time she did that Mirja looked her in the eyes and nodded for her to go even harder. She did. Sigrid got so excited and frustrated from the sessions that she had to go see Irese almost every night, if only for ten drops.

She even had trouble meditating during the day as she couldn’t get the images of Jarl’s erect cock out of her mind as some Master or other droned on down at the podium.

“I like it when you hold me,” Mirja said one evening after Jarl had left for one of his late sessions with the Mistresses.

The dark-haired girl looked her in the eyes. She was laying on one of the sofas with a book held up over her face.

“I can tell you like it too.”

Sigrid looked away. She heard how the other girl put the book down and rose. Sigrid looked her way.

“Why don’t you join us. We are basically doing it under your nose. I can tell that you want to,” she said sitting down an arms-length from Sigrid.

Sigrid looked at her with hard eyes.

“I cannot.”

“Why?” Mirja said and wrinkled here eyebrows.

“It is not allowed.”

“To be with men?”

“To be with marks,” Sigrid said looking away.

She flinched as Mirja’s hand touched hers.

“Okay. I still like it when you hold me. Especially when you hold me really hard and tight so I cannot move at all,” she said stroking her fingers over Sigrid’s hand.

Sigrid had to concentrate not to move her hand away. She felt Mirja move closer.

“Have you ever been with a woman,” came Mirja’s voice so close she could feel her breath.

Sigrid sat perfectly still. She had seen Mirja naked a hundred times. She knew the woman’s body in such detail she could draw her in her sleep. And more times than she could count the urge to reach out and touch a breast, her stomach, her butt or her cleft had passed through her mind. And every time she had pushed the urge away.

It was complicated enough with Irese. With Mirja it would be impossible. She turned towards Mirja and looked her in the eye.

“I have.”

Then she stood up and walked out of the room.

“I know what your problem is,” Irese said caressing her cheek as they lay panting next to each other.

It was hot even this late in the evening, sweat trickled down Irese’s forehead. Sigrid could not completely come to terms with that the summer nights here were warmer than then hottest high summer day in the north.

“All the men you’ve been with. You fall in love with them. And they don’t love you back.”

It was as if she had stabbed right through her. A long slender dagger that found its way in between the ribs and pierced her heart. Leaving her to quickly bleed out. She rolled over with her back against Irese so as that the other woman wouldn’t see her face. It was Sacreday night and the princess had temporarily put Sigrid out of a job. At least until morning. The princess had insisted that Sigrid not be present when she was with Jarl. It was likely a breach of contract, but Sigrid didn’t care. It meant that she could spend a few hours more with Irese.

“I’m right ain’t I,” Irese said crawling up close to her cradling her from behind. “Good. Cause then I also have the solution.”

Sigrid almost stopped breathing. She just lay there waiting for Irese’s next words.

“What you’ve got to do is to find a man that you hate. And then you’ve got to fuck him.”

Sigrid spun around and looked Irese straight in the eye. For once she had no trouble reading the other woman. A man I hate? I haven’t spent enough time with anyone but Jarl. And I don’t hate him. She never hated her marks. Not the ones she protected. Nor the ones she killed. They were just marks.

“No feelings you see. Just fulfillment of desire. It’s better if it’s a good-looking man. I like ‘em big and strong. As you may have noticed.”

Sigrid studied the other woman closely. No. No deception there. She was serious.

*A man I hate.* And then it struck her. She had the perfect mark.

————————————————

This was chapter 6-7 of our book An Ode to Uncertainty.

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